Ten Minutes Ago // Ben Tyler Cook

Part Two / Chapter Eighteen

Marlee's POV
Out of all the things that I imagined could have happened tonight, Ben proposing was definitely not one of them. When he began his speech, I had no idea where it would lead. But when he got down on one knee, my heart dropped.
   
"I love you, Marlee Jane Granger," he says, trying very hard not to tear up. "I have from the moment I met you. WIll you marry me?"
   
My eyes fill with tears of my own, but I'm not sure if it's from happiness, shock, or fear of the answer I don't know if I'm strong enough to give. "Ben," I start, hoping I'll be able to speak clearly. "Ben, more than anything, I want to say yes."
   
He stands, confusion appearing in his eyes. "Then why don't you?" He speaks gently, taking both of my hands in his. "I-is it too soon?"
   
I shake my head. "No, no it's not too soon at all. But," I pause, figuring out how to phrase my next sentence, "the situation's changed."
   
His face falls, causing my heart to feel heavier than it's ever been. "What happened?"
   
"That phone call I got was from my agent. She says that they want me to play Glinda in Wicked in London."
   
"Marlee, that's huge news." Ben tries to keep the sadness out of his voice, but I know him too well. "I'm so proud of you."
   
Shaking my head, I take a breath, trying to steady my heart. "Ben, I don't know if I can be apart from you again, but my agent says that this is the chance of a lifetime. It'll boost my reputation as an actress. So, I accepted."
   
"No, Marlee, we can make it work," he argues. "We made it through six months. We were okay. It wasn't easy at all, but I love you. We can make it through this."
   
It takes all the strength I have to remove my hands from his. "I don't want to put you through this again." My tears finally spill over. "Being in two different countries is something different altogether. I...I won't put you through it, and I can't go through it myself."
   
"Marlee," Ben says desperately. "Please. Please don't do this. You know I love you. You can have something to look forward to when you get home." He reaches for my hand again, but I step back, my heart breaking into a thousand pieces.
   
I shake my head. "I can't. I'm sorry." With that, I know I can't stand to look at his broken expression another time. I turn and quickly make my way to the train station, wiping any tears that come.
   
Part of me wishes I had turned down the role. I could have said yes, and the night could have ended with both of us on cloud nine. Instead, I chose what's best for my career, not knowing what it would cost me.
   
But you love him. How could you do this to him? I push those thoughts far from my mind as I board the train toward home. In everything around me, I see Ben. I see him holding my hand on the train. I see him walking me home after every date, no matter the weather. When I reach my apartment, I see him finally asking me to be his girlfriend. As soon as I close the door behind me, I'm no longer able to hold back the tears. I somehow make it to my bedroom, thankful that Noelle isn't home, and I pretty much collapse on my bed.
   
What have I done?

~~~~~
sorry