**julian pov**
I slowly pulled away from jayde and it started to hit me how bad I had fucked up. I saw a look of regret in her eyes and quickly got out of my bed. She sat up and bit her lip while playing with her fingers.
"Fuck jayde I am so sorry." I said as I paced back and forth.
Alex trusted me with his girlfriend and I completely betrayed him and took advantage of her in her most vulnerable state.
"Julian we cant do this." Jayde whispered.
I gave her a confused look.
"This is the second time we've kissed. Either you don't want to be with me or I can't be with you. I don't get it."
"Jayde it's not that I didn't want to be with you. At the beach I couldn't betray jabez."
"Well now I can't betray alex. Julian we cant. This between us has to stop. I can't be around you if everytime we're alone we kiss. And trust me, not being around you would be hell. Please, let's end this. I need my best friend."
"Ok" I mumbled.
"So that means no more kissing, ever."
"Got it, what are you gonna tell alex?"
"If this is never gonna happen again, which it won't, then I don't see a reason to tell him."
"Fine by me." I agreed.
I walked to my closet and gathered a few blankets.
"What are those for?"
"I'm gonna crash on the floor"
"Julian we're best friends, best friends can share a bed." She laughed.
I smiled in return and neatly placed the blankets back in the closet. I slowly climbed into bed facing the opposite direction as jayde. I stared at the smiley face etched in sharpie on my wall by Carlos when it was just the boys. No girls, no drama. As I listened to Jayde's steady breathing behind me, I slowly drifted to sleep.
**jayde pov**
I'm so tired. I want to sleep but I can't stop thinking of Alex. He's such an amazing person. He trusts me to sleep at another boys house and believes me when I tell him something isn't true. He's literally perfect and Im still finding many ways to fuck our relationship up. He has done nothing but love me and I have done nothing but hurt him. I love Alex. I can't keep hurting him. The thoughts racing in my head started to slow down and I was soon asleep.
Next morning
I woke up to an empty bed. I checked my phone and saw that it was already 2:37, which means school has already ended. I sat on the edge of the bed and searched for my socks so I didnt walk on the cold floor. After I found some I put them on and walked downstairs. In the livingroom sat the whole friend group. When Alex saw me emerge from upstairs his face immediately lit up.
"Good morning gorgeous." He said while wrapping his arms around me.
I smiled and let him hold me for a solid minute. He let me go and led me towards the couch where everyone else was sitting. I took a seat next to him and rested my head on his shoulder. I glanced at Julian and recognized a guilty stare in his eyes. I swallowed hard and ignored him. As the conversation went on I realized that I was still in my pajamas.
"I'm gonna go change I'll be right back." I announced.
Everybody mumbled in agreement as I stood up and headed upstairs. I got to julians room and softly shut the door. As I slowly gathered my clothes I began to remember all the details of last night. The look of lust in julians eyes and the regret that came right after it. I was pulling my shirt over my head when I heard a soft knock at the door. I opened it and saw Alex standing in the hall.
