TW: panic attacks and physical abuse please don't read if it triggers you or makes you uncomfortable <3
Sirius slammed his bedroom door as his mother continued to scream about how much of a disappointment he is, "do you ever shut up? Merlin" he mumbled while locking the door, he could feel his breathing getting heavier and his heart pounding so he decided to talk to James, he pulled out the mirror from under his bed, since his family had an affinity to look through his stuff. He looked at the mirror," James Potter, " He called waiting for a few minutes but James didn't respond. Sweat started pouring from his body and the room started getting hot, he wished one of his friends is here.
After he calmed down a bit he took off his clothes and changed into one of Remus's sweaters; it smelled like him and if Remus isn't here to calm him down his smell would. He threw himself on the bed attempting to sleep...it wasn't working, he shifted and tossed to find a comfortable position until he heard a sudden knock on his window, he ignored it probably. But after a few seconds, he heard the knock again, when he stood up to check what was disturbing him he felt dizzy but there was a figure of a human?
He opened the window and was surprised. Is that "Remus?" Sirius questioned out loud, "'Ello, " Remus greeted with a smile on his face "what the actual fuck are you doing here?" Sirius giggled with amusement "what? aren't I allowed to see my boyfriend?" Sirius was just starring at Remus in awe and surprise, Remus isn't normally the one who does stuff like that, never less, he was incredibly grateful. "How did you even-" "well, " he began while showing Sirius some keys "your 17 years old half-blood boyfriend might've gotten his license and a car." He smiled "well, are you going to let me in?" "come in." Sirius took Remus's hand so he doesn't fall from the third-floor window.
The room was dark the only light coming from the moon and the stars, the moon, and the stars were staring into each other, admiring the other's beauty. "I missed you, " "I missed you, too, Siri." Sirius wrapped his arms around Remus's waist in a tight hug, and Remus hugged back, it felt so warm and so good to finally have Remus physically there, "is that my sweater? When did you-" a harsh knock on the door interrupted him. "quick hide under the bed!" Sirius said with a hushed tone.
"open the door now!" his mother yelled while banging on the door, Sirius went to open the door, he was so nervous but didn't show it. "what? I was going to sleep." "you disobeyed me, " "no, I just finished my dinner and came up to my room." Remus wished Sirius would stop having an attitude, he knew this will not end well. "you shall not disrespect your mother." Walburga continued to scream, "You. Are not. My. Mother" "Crucio!" in a blink of an eye, Sirius was on the floor yelling and crying. Remus gasped he needs to do something about it, he knew he should but he couldn't move, "mother, stop please!" Regulus said as he came running to the room.
She stopped when Regulus stood in between her and Sirius, " next time I will not stop when Regulus comes." she added before she walked out and slammed the door shut. Remus ran to a shaking Sirius as fast as he could, "Lupin? What on earth are you doing here?" "Fuck. uh, good question, I will answer you after I help Sirius, " Remus was talking quickly trying to help Sirius "fuck, I'm so sorry I wanted to help and fight her but I couldn't. Fuck I'm so sorry." "It is okay I'm fine, " "Sirius are you fucking joking? You just got hit with an unforgivable curse, a fucking torturing curse. And you say "I'm fine"?!?"
"l going to bring water," Regulus said walking out the door,
"Sirius, can you stand up? "yes, I-I'm fine Remus, " "you are trembling!" "I'm not." "I want to help, Siri." "b-but I don't need help, Remus. Look, I'm fine" Sirius said as he stood up, walking to his bed. "I'm not weak, I did it before." "you are not weak, you are one of the strongest people I know, no one else would've handled that, but it's okay to ask for help. I mean, I'm not the one to talk about asking for help-but you know."
Sirius was now shaking on his bed, "no-no-no, I'm fine, Remus, I'm fine, I'm fine." He was now crying and it got harder and harder for him to breathe, Remus's heart broke at the sight of Sirius looking so hurt.
He wrapped his arms around Sirius and pulled him closer, putting his chin over Sirius's head. "It's okay, darling. It's okay, take a deep breath, 1..2..3..4. Now let out, 5..6.7" Remus continued counting till Sirius calmed down.
"you are coming with me," Remus said after a while of silence.
"what?"
"you are coming with me I can't leave you here, you won't get hurt as long as I'm with you."
Regulus walked in with a cup of water "sorry, took long I had to be quiet."
"I can't leave Reg alone," Sirius whispered.
"Regulus? Do you wanna leave?"
"what do you mean?"
"I'm going to take Sirius with me, do you wanna leave too?"
"I-I...I don't know..."
"Reg, please I can't stay here."
"I can't, Sirius..."
"I will come back okay? I promise."
"Okay..." Regulus as he leaving the bedroom Sirius called
"wait, Reg..." "yeah?" "c-can I hug you?"
Regulus turned around and nodded his head while walking towards Sirius, his arms stretched ready to wrap them around his brother's neck. "I'm so sorry they do this to you," he said sniffing.
"I'm sorry I'm going to leave you with them, "
Regulus glanced at Remus, smiled, and said "Now, Lupin, you didn't answer me. Why are you here?" "oh-uh Sirius? Some help?" "um well, isn't he allowed to see his amazing, gorgeous, and great boyfriend?" Sirius said nervously.
"knew it!" "no, you did not!" "yes, I did, I was waiting for you to tell me." Regulus smiled, still hugging Sirius tightly. "Take care of him for me, Lupin" "I always will." Regulus pulled away from Sirius and exited the room.
"come on let pack your stuff."
"Okay, now I will go down first, and then after you come down I will Accio your trunk. Alright?" "Yeah."
Remus climbed down the window, it was a bit hard not to fall but he managed to get down safely, "Okay I'm down your turn!" Sirius started to climb down slowly but his hands got too sweaty and he fell but Remus was fast to catch him "Be careful or else we will have to explain to a Muggle doctor cause I'm not gonna attempt to heal your bones." "Okay, okay. Would you let me down now? I can walk you know." Remus let Sirius down and gave him the car keys "go sit in the car I will bring your trunk." he pointed at a blue caravan. Sirius walked to it, unlocked it, and got in.
On the inside, it had two green seats in front of the stirring wheel, in the back, there were two sofa beds and a little fridge in front of the sink which had cabinets above it.
He sat in the front passenger seat waiting for Remus, he put his head in his hand, he was still shaking and couldn't comprehend what was happening.
"Hey, baby-" Sirius flinched at the touch and voice of Remus, Remus moved his hand away from Sirius pretty quickly. "It's okay, just me. Are you okay?" "so...sorry" Sirius muttered "Are you okay?" Remus asked again, Sirius looked at him and nodded. He started the car and got on the road "now, why are you apologizing?" "I- just don't- didn't...I don't want you- I hate th-that I got you in-volved in all that shit, and and that you h-had to see the...I just -never wanted you to see me like that." "Hey, hey look at me...I will always be there for you, and I know what you mean I hate when you see me after the full moon; it's the time I'm weakest and I don't want any of you to think I'm weak. Sometimes I let you help me because I know that I need help...also in those times, I know you guys don't think I'm weak. So you know it can be hard to ask for help sometimes, doesn't mean you are weak or anything." he took Sirius's hand in his "Thank you Remmy, really th-ank you so so much for everything. But stop because you're gonna make me cry and I cried enough." They both cackled "I love you." "Alright Remus I told you to stop making me cry, I love you too."
Remus parked the car near a little shop, "why did we stop?" " come on get out." "what? Why?" "well I figured the only way to stop you crying" he got out of the car and opened Sirius's door for him "is to get some ice cream." Sirius got out of the car and hugged Remus "thank you." "you are welcome, but come on cause I have been driving for three hours." they walked into the shop, got their ice cream, and Remus went back to the van "wait, moons, there is a park nearby can we go eat our ice cream there?" "Of course, get in." Remus drove until they got to the park, he opened the back doors and called Sirius to sit in the back seat next to him, Sirius then laid his head on his shoulder "thank you." "for what?" "saving me from them." "well, of course, I would what you think I would let you stay there?" "Still, thank you." "I love you, idiot." "I love you too." they ate their ice cream in silence until Remus heard Sirius snoring. He carried him inside to the sofa and laid him down gently.
Sirius woke up screaming and crying. That's when Remus stopped the car and rushed over to check on him, "Hey, it's okay. You are okay, it was just a dream. Look at me." Sirius was sweating so much and he looked pale, he was looking around the van and then broke down crying again. "Can I hug you, Siri?" Sirius let Remus's arms wrap around him and he tucked his head in Remus's neck. "I hate-hate them so m-much." "I know you do, and I hate them too. Now you don't have to go back there yeah? You are going to stay with me for as long as you want or you can go to James's after-the point is you don't have to go back and you are not going back no matter what. They are not going to do anything to you." "i- you- we need to go back." "what? No! Didn't you hear what I said? We are not going back - you are not going back there. you hear me?" "but what if this is a bad idea? And Reg I can't leave reg alone. What if something happens to him and I'm not there and everything goes wrong and-and it would be my faul-" "Woah Woah, calm down baby. It's going to be okay, Regulus will be okay. You need to breathe." Sirius was trying to take deep breaths while Remus reached into his pocket and gave Sirius a chocolate bar. "Here, eat this." Sirius laughed while wiping his tears then took the chocolate "I don't think you will ever realize that I don't like chocolate." "shush we don't talk about that," he said while walking back to the driver's seat. "We need to go 'cause I'm getting tired so, come and sit next to me?" "only if you play some rock and hold my hand." "of course I will who do you think I am."
