The Coldest Winter.

23.

   "Well?" Devonté asked, getting seemingly impatient waiting for my response.
"I haven't exactly told her my answer yet." I said honestly.
"Why not?"
"Do you honestly think it's a good idea? What if she doesn't like me either?"
Devonté frowned.
"Of course I think it's a good idea! Don't overthink it Isaiah. She's your grandmother. Your father's mother at that, I really think she has your best interest at heart. Unlike that bitch that caused you so much pain."
I looked at my bestfriend with a semi shocking look. It wasn't often he dropped the B bomb, only when he was passionate about what he was saying did you ever rarely hear him swear.
He had a point I couldn't deny though. She is my grandma, maybe she does have my best interest at heart, maybe she's my knight in shining armor I've been waiting on.
   After dinner of ribs, macaroni & cheese, collard greens and handmade rolls, I took a shower to wash off the events from today.
While I let the hot soothing water run down my chest, shoulders, and legs I thought about all my life had consisted of.
I had been through hell and back, I never thought anybody would want to love me like my grandma does. I never thought a love like that really existed. I was always told I wasn't good enough, and that nobody would want me. I was told I was a waste of time so much I started to believe it. And what about Nate? We weren't brothers, but we were family. Even though to him he didn't seem like he wanted that from me. I'd be sad if I left him, but part of me feels he wouldn't really care. It was always about her, I had no place in his life and That was pretty much evident. My grandma would be calling tomorrow expecting an answer, I just hope I'm making the right choice.
   The water turned cold and I knew it was time to get out. I dried my body off with a towel, slipped on some deodorant and put on some new going-to-sleep clothes my grandma had bought me earlier.
"Oh I like that." Devonté says as I walked in the room and flopped on the bed adjacent to his.
"You do?" I asked, admiring the Spongebob pattern on my pajamas.
I only watched Spongebob when Nate and Beatrice weren't home and I had the TV all to myself, I can count on my hands how many times I've watched it. Nonetheless, I loved spongebob.
"I do, it's dope bestfriend." He said as he cut off his lamp.
"Thanks." I said as I did the same.
Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow. I hope this goes smoothly...