The Girl Who Hid | ✓

|10| Gilderoy Lockhart

The first day of Second Year went pretty well; our morning classes were Herbology with Hufflepuffs and Transfiguration, then lunch, and for our afternoon class we had Defense Against the Dark Arts with Slytherins. The first two classes were okay, besides Ron's sparking, rotten-egg smelling wand. But lunch was a show; Malfoy thought it would be a good idea to taunt Harry about how much Professor Lockhart favors him (for his fame). And it didn't help with Lockhart got involved.

Defense Against the Dark Arts class wasn't any better. Ron and Hermione sat on either side of Harry while I sat next to Hermione.

"You could've fried an egg on your face," said Ron. "You'd better hope Creevey doesn't meet Ginny, or they'll be starting a Harry Potter fan club."

"Shut up," snapped Harry.

"Talking about Ginny, do you know where she was during lunch?" I asked. "She was supposed to meet me at the library."

"Why would I know where she is?" Ron said.

"Isn't she your sister?"

"And?"

When the whole class was seated, Lockhart cleared his throat loudly and silence fell. He reached forward, picked up Neville Longbottom's copy of Travels with Trolls, and held it up to show his own, winking portrait on the front.

"Me," he said, pointing at it and winking as well. "Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award but I don't talk about that. I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at her!"

He waited for them to laugh; a few people smiled weakly.

"I see you've all bought a complete set of my books — well done. I thought we'd start today with a little quiz. Nothing to worry about — just to check how well you've read them, how much you've taken in —"

When he had handed out the test papers he returned to the front of the class and said, "You have thirty minutes — start —now!"

Looking down at my paper, I almost groaned at the narcissism this teacher possessed.

1. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite color?

2. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?

3. What, in your opinion, is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?

On and on it went, over three sides of paper, right down to:

54. When is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday, and what would his ideal gift be?

Half an hour later, Lockhart collected the papers and rifled through them in front of the class.

"I really hope this wasn't counted as a grade," I whispered to Hermione.

"Tut, tut — hardly any of you remembered that my favorite color is lilac. I say so in Year with the Yeti. And a few of you need to read Wanderings with Werewolves more carefully — I clearly state in chapter twelve that my ideal birthday gift would be harmony between all magic and non-magic peoples — though I wouldn't say no to a large bottle of Ogden's Old Firewhisky!"

He gave us another roguish wink. Harry's mouth was hanging slightly open at his words; Ron was now staring at Lockhart with an expression of disbelief on his face; Seamus Finnigan and Dean Thomas, who were sitting in front, were shaking with silent laughter. Hermione, on the other hand, was listening to Lockhart with rapt attention and gave a start when he mentioned her name.