You never know until you try

The catcher

It had been a while and you had fully healed from your surgery. It was now October and you could not wait for Halloween. It has always been your favorite holiday and you were now counting down the days until it would finally come.

You were sitting in the classroom while Kylo stood in front of the class. You had decided that the next book the class was going to read was The Catcher in the Rye. He now stood in front of the class and explained the symbolism within book.

"Does anyone actually know where the name of the book stemmed from?" he said addressing the class

The room was silent

He looked to you for an answer

"Oh--well um--It was an old poem I think? It was about someone trying to catch children who were flinging themselves off a cliff. The children represent... well innocence, and the catcher is trying to keep them from growing up. The cliff is the loss of innocence and the start of maturity. So the catcher is trying to save the innocence that they once had for the rest of the children. That is why his name is Holden...He's hold-en onto his innocence as hard as he can. He even tries to hold his sister's innocence too." you looked up at the class with an awkward smile.

"Maybe you should be teaching the class instead of me" his face was stone cold and empty

"I'm sorry sir. I just thought-" he cut you off

"I appreciate your insight, but next time please keep your answer short. Now moving on. Holden---"

You tuned out the rest of the conversation. You had so much to add but this class wasn't for you and you were not the teacher. You had to let the students do the thinking. You sat in the back and input grades

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When the bell rang for lunch you continued putting the grades in the computer. Kylo walked to his desk and sat down. He turned his chair to look at you. Suddenly the stone face melted away and he asked you a question:

"Would you like to teach the class all by yourself tomorrow? We were going to have a substitute and watch Rebel Without a Cause but after what I heard from you today I think you should take over the class." His voice was professional. Definitely not what you were used to when you were alone with him

"Really?" you looked at him, but your voice was angry

"What?" he looked at you confused

"You're seriously going to insult me in front of the whole class and then just expect me to be willing to do as you say? That was really embarrassing for me. I'm sure that you saw my face turn bright red. Responses like that is why I never raised my hand in class to share my thoughts. Because assholes like you shoot me down and make me feel like I'm a burden. You really shot me back into high school right then and I did not like it at all." you said sternly. You weren't exactly yelling at him, but your voice got the message across that you were not playing games.

"I didn't mean to--" he tried to explain himself but you cut him off

"I know you didn't mean to. But people don't usually mean to upset people. But think. Just think about it. You have probably said that to one of your students, or something similar. That student may have wanted to be a writer and you could have shot them down. Do you do this often? Embarrass your students, or fucking me in that case. Maybe you're shooting down students before they can even grow" you were on the border of yelling but took a deep breath, and looked up at him

"I'm sorry Kylo" your voice softened

"No I'm sorry. I did not think of it like that. I guess I'm just not used to being intimidated like that. You're the only person that has brought that to my attention. Every student I've ever talked to is running through my head right now. I'm so sorry that my words affected you negatively. It was not my intention. I'm sorry." he looked up at you with his amber eyes. His legs were spread wide and his elbows were rested on his knees, his head was in his hands and the sight alone made you want to hug him

He could be so gentle

"I'll teach tomorrow, IF you come over tonight and make me food." you said jokingly

"Deal" he said. His eyes never left your face

"Oh--I wasn't serious but I mean I would like it if you did that" you turned in your seat and faced your computer. You could feel his eyes digging into your soul

"I'll be over at 6:30, I have some things to do after school.'' he also turned towards his computer.

You have to teach the class tomorrow. YOU have to TEACH a class TOMORROW...

This should be interesting. 

Hello friends! I have been having so many medical issues and I have been in the doctor's office every day since last Saturday (It is currently Thursday). It's been draining so I haven't had the motivation to write. Plus basically no one is seeing this so that discourages me as well. I hope you're all doing well and having a great week. Pls share this with your friends because I crave validation from strangers.