Talking Serenity (Completed)

Mazed Kinship

Inheriting genes and character from two biological individuals that come from a family that lacks frugality and exploring their talents for better opportunities is a thing that I know can be destructive and capable of prolonging the rusty battle we experience. Particularly, if there's still a living "plain paper" in the house that needs to be written with the right knowledge. It is a chaotic circumstance that I know could grant the feeling of having a birthday with a toxic guest by force, over and over again.

So far, in these hours, minutes, and seconds, this matter alone has caused many of my truths to be forgotten. I grew sad and frustrated to see how such individuals with such behavior want me to be honest and openly say the truth, but always use their salary, brethren, and other associates as a shield and ultimate weapon to twist every insightful conversation I utter as if I'm the one that should apologize.

When it comes to this undesirable biological content, all I can say is...living with these atomic radiations for more than 2 decades is surely has been able to hijack my anxiety and my brain into loving the delusional pleasures and abominations that I don't even understand, which is something that I know could be worse if there is no consciousness of following the right ingenious "alpha" that is able to attract radiance for those with threatening impurity. It is one of the inner voices that has helped and saved me from doing the unnecessaries, which surprisingly exists in my emotions.

Although...sometimes I can vouch for my mind towards composing profounding patience and stabilizing the unexpected things that these hereditary characters bestowed upon me, still...until this day, the anxiety and the nightmare of being trapped between unstable generosity and the cool cynical vibe are strong enough to make the mind I live with feel unclear. A never-ending inner argument, which I hope should never happen to anybody with a similar experience, even if every week feels like a combination between the battle of Stalingrad and a spaceship blast.

What seems to be the message regarding this personal issue is...internally getting older faster than most people and relatives in the family is an advantage and a curse at the same time, especially if the person who experienced is still living together in the same room with individuals that resembles a child with tuxedo and an empress with a spoony nature. A nature, which could make any kind of argument appear degenerative and playable, causing the listener and other victims to undergo the dirty game unconsciously.

Up to now, as the eldest sibling, the only utterance I can spare regarding this element is...it is hard for me to breathe and forgive when both of my guardians only exist to find a way to silence the jokes and complications that kills trust and a sympathetic atmosphere.

The atmosphere from this event surely can give a glimpse of a proportionate future, but it will be harder and seems impossible to reach...if there's a "little scientist" that mourns for safer ground and greater speculation. It is an inner demonstration that shouldn't be pushed into a renewing situation, which is supposed to be remembered for a lifetime by many married adults. Particularly, if there's a desire to breed many living presences that can control their inner combustion evolution toward fighting many inherited mutations and paranoia.

On the other side of aftermaths, bear in mind that the impetuosity towards the egocentric level we develop will only make our children suffer from expressing and gratifying themselves, even if there's a useful mildness that blooms inside them. It is a noteworthy universe that I know has made many of my generations weep at each other realizations, which never had a place in our attention before we promised a better league of nexus for the newer generations.

The hardest complementary hardships about facing these arcane problems are not about seeing the same suffocating reinforcement, but it's more about realizing how expensive it is to have or experience a natural convenient recovery when personal obligations and inner voice seem to demand it consistently at the right moment for better soundness of mind, which is one of the solid reason why downloading sophisticated affirmation applications become endless and preferred as if it was oxygen.

It is another important reality, which I find rarely has a deep meeting point and only ends in the background of a sense of guilt. A causal reason of which why every new "soon to be parents" generation is able to become more heavily atrocious and entitled than the previous, causing today's sleeping hours to possess unreconciled tides. A thing, which I know is capable of provoking animosity that is known to have momentum in dwindling rationality.

It needs to be known that the heartbeat that we cultivate around the pressure of knowing a new identity will only destroy future relationships with our little descendants if it is only filled with personal speeches and not with conversations about the lack of ability in understanding the obligations that are capable of prospering both sides. It is the only resolution that needs to be empowered first if we do want most children in our world to have a vigorous clarifying strength, even if there's a kindred issue that could drain a pleasing quietness.