Blind and Bereft

Chapter 73 | To Save Him

Jingrui sat by the lotus pond. A dried trail of tears stained her face as she stared at the wilted lotuses.

What is life if flowers do not bloom, and people do not love?

Her heart jabbed with pain when she thought back to what she had done. She didn't mean to hurt him, but when she thought of Xiaobai's death, every strand of her body was overcome with poisonous fury. Flooded with a deluge of grudge, her body moved on its own as if she were a puppet being controlled. All reasoning was lost, and she couldn't forgive herself for what she had done.

He, too, wouldn't forgive her for what she had done.

From the very first day she entered the Heavenly Palace, the only thing she lived for was vengeance because she had thought it was the only way the moon could be full again. She had thought it was the only way she could relieve the pain.

Yet, sitting by the lotus pond, why did she feel so hurt?

She could only hope that, since her strength was weak and the knife didn't pierce far, he would be alright. Prince Zhanying had always been kind to her. Through lifetime catastrophes, he was there by her side. He had always been protecting her, and he had always loved her. No matter what he had done, he had never once hurt her.

And yet, she had hurt him.

As she sat in devastation, she heard a familiar shrieking voice of the Goddess of Beauty. "You, despicable wretch!" she screeched, her nostrils flaring. "I know His Highness doesn't love me, but so what? Even if he doesn't love me, I had never wanted him to die. It's all your fault, wretch!"

Jingrui wiped her tear stains as she shot the Goddess a glare. "Please leave me alone, Goddess."

Yuetong crossed her arms, her eyes swollen red. "I won't leave you alone! You have to repent for hurting Zhanying. If he dies, I will never forgive you, and I will make sure you will be buried alive with him!"

Jingrui felt suffocated as if something was smothering her. She gulped, her face turned sallow. "What do you mean?" Her voice held a tremor. "W-What do you mean, he's dying? My stab was barely enough to hurt him, what do you mean he is dying?"

The Goddess let out a wail as she curled her hands in her hair. "The knife was poisoned, you fool!" She cried, shaking her head. "That bastard, Yihuai, gave me that knife, and I only found out after you had left that he dipped the knife in an incurable, heated Jincan!"

Jingrui's heart squeezed, her widened, and her voice came out like a raspy breath. "What are you saying?" Searing pain shot up her throat, and she felt the taste of steel at the tip of her tongue. She had not yet healed from the torture she endured in the dungeon, and she collapsed down against the pond, tears stinging her eyes. "I don't understand what you are saying."

"It's all your fault. If you had trusted in him, if you had really loved him enough to have faith in him, then this wouldn't have happened! He is really wrong for loving someone like you. You call him cold and adamant, but in truth, you are the heartless one!"

Jingrui tilted her head towards the sky that had turned to a shade of amber, dancing like flames across the clouds. She shook her head rapidly, refusing to intake the truth.

Yuetong's veins popped out her neck. "You are a heartless wretch. Do you know what happened after you left the study hall? Zhanying was punished with lightning strikes because he disobeyed Yihuai for you. The thundering roar could be heard throughout Heaven, surely you must have sensed a storm!" Her fists clenched. "How can you pretend you love him, when you don't even trust him? I'll tell you now, little wretch, Zhanying didn't kill your friend!"

Her heart sank, and she shook her head, feeling everything in her crumbling down. "Z-Zhanying didn't kill Xiaobai?" Her breathing was shaky as she looked down at her trembling hands. "Zhanying didn't kill Xiaobai."

Yuetong tittered as she placed her hand over her face. "That maid was dragged upstairs to be killed by Yihuai himself. All of it was a part of Yihuai's scheme. He wanted you to resent Zhanying, and he wanted you to stab him and shatter his soul; a much more painful death for the God of War than just assassinating him."

Jingrui clenched her fists as she shot a glare at Yuetong. "Why are you telling me this? You were the one who took part in the scheming, why are you regretting now?"

"Because I didn't expect Yihuai to poison the blade! I just wanted you to hurt him, so that Zhanying would resent you for all eternity. I have never wanted him to die!" Yuetong's voice cracked and she sniffled. "It's all your fault, and now the poison will slowly consume him, spread throughout his vital energy, and turn him into nothing but ash. Only Yihuai has the antidote for such a wicked poison. . ."

Jingrui shot up, her body trembled as she walked towards Yuetong. "Y-Yihuai has the antidote?"

"He was the one who made the jincan, of course he does."

"Tell me where he keeps it." Her every breath was stinging her. "Tell me, where is the antidote?"

Yuetong's crimson lips quivered, and she took a step back from Jingrui. "He keeps it in his chamber. When I spent nights with him, I spotted a drawer where he kept jars of medicines and toxins... But you are just a good-for-nothing maid, there's no way you can get into his chamber, least, retrieve the antidote."

"I started all this, no matter what means I must stoop to, I will get the antidote."

Yuetong sneered. "Even if you get the antidote for him, it's unlikely that he will forgive you. I know Zhanying well enough to know how much he hates betrayal. The Palace had already tormented him enough, and now, even you sunk him back into the abyss he dreaded. There's no way he can forgive you."

Jingrui closed her eyes, letting the last drop of tears fall. "Just as long as I can save him, he doesn't need to forgive me."

The Goddess of Beauty clenched her fists as she straightened her posture. "Fine, then, little maid. Although I despise you to the deepest depths of my soul, I will help you. Just this once. Not for you, but for Zhanying."

Jingrui looked up, her eyes wavered with pain, and she nodded.

Yuetong cleared her throat. "So, here's the plan."