Naked

Roleplay part 3

Lane's POV:

"So.....what do you wanna do now?" Jon asked as he stares at me waiting for an answer.

"I want to talk to Austin..I want to hear everything from him. That's all I want for now.." I answered.

"I already figured that out but I mean what if Austin doesn't wanna talk?" He replied.

"Please Jon. You have to help me. You're the only person I know that could help me right now." I begged.

"Girrrrrl." Jon answered.

"Fine. Okay. I don't know where Austin lives now and he already changed his number too. But I do know that last time I saw him in a supermarket that he said is near his new place. He said he often goes there. We could try to go there and see? I mean? Might as well try?" He continued.

I grabbed Jon's hands and gave him my biggest smile.

"Jon,you have no idea how much I appreciate this." I said.

"Well it's not like you will even go if I say no." He teased.

"Mean." I replied.

"Okay. Let's do a roleplay. Pretend that I'm Austin. And tell me what you will say." Jon suggested as we both sat on the carpet of his living room while facing each other.

"What is this for?" I asked.

"So we will be sure you will say everything to him. This might be your last chance." He answered.

And with that, Jon and I did a roleplay. I was able to tell Jon everything I ever wanted to say to Austin. Let's just hope that when time comes that I see him again I'll really be able to say a single word.

Jon wipe away his tears and gave me a hug.

"My god. Bishhh why did you have to make me cry??? I feel like every person who broke up with me came back and broke up with me again." He said.

"Lane...that is fucking beautiful. I truly truly trulyyyyyyy hope that this time you both get the happy ending you both wanted in the first place." Jon added.

"Okay. Let's get ready and leave." Jon said as I grab all my stuff with me.

Okay..this is it. I felt like I was going to war. A war that you don't know whether if it still exist. Because maybe you're the only person left fighting. At this point it's all or nothing. I know I really just have to see Austin.

—

Jon and I went to the store near Austin's place,with the hopes of seeing him there. I felt anxious and nervous like I want to go home but also want to stay and look for him. As we go near the entrance of the store, I felt weird...different. I know there must be something here.

He must be here.

Why the hell do I feel so nervous?? I feel really weird. Calm down Lane. You can't cry right now. You can't mess this up this time.

As Jon and I went inside the store,my eyes were already looking for Austin.

But...

How does Austin look like now? Does he have the same haircut? Same hair color? Does he still wear the same kind of clothes? Same kind of shoes?

I realized how time can really change people. The thought of it scared me. What if he isn't the same person I fell for? What if it's just really not the same?

What if...

Love already passed us by, but the only thing that keeps me going is pretending that it's still there?

Have I really been doing roleplay by myself this entire time?

No... it's not roleplay. It's what people call...

A lie.

Because you lie to yourself..

because sometimes a lie is the only thing that keeps us going..

isn't it?

***