by Reflectionsofasinner
Every young girl has at least once set her eyes on this one boy or young man with a nice MashaAllah beard and a dashing smile that captured her heart.
The moment he spoke or read a verse of soothing Qiraat with his ammmmaaaazingly high pitched sweet voice, he instantaneously made her fall head over heels in love with him.
Or maybe even his Sunnah attire captured her eyes and then her tiny little heart causing it to flutter each time she heard of him.
Having these feelings are a normal part of youth, its normal to feel desire burning for the opposite gender HOWEVER.... There's always a however. However there is a way to deal with them and that is definitely not via dating.
Desire is a part of youth. Our tests of youth is to suppress it. Such can be done if we have Taqwa.
Rasoolallah صلى الله عليه وسلم said something to the effect: "Verily Allah Ta'ala becomes pleased with a youngster who isn't inclined towards sin. (i.e, one who grows up in the obedience of Allah Ta'ala)"
(Musnad Ahmad, vol. 4 pg. 151, Musnad Abi Ya'la, Hadith: 1743 and Al-Mu'jamul Kabir, vol. 11, Hadith: 853 [17].)
The West often tell us that it is okay to have a crush. It is not okay to have a crush. It is normal to see some eye candy but whenever you see eye candy there are certain things you should do:
1. Immediately lower your gaze no matter how hard it is. The reward will be greater.
2. Recite some istighfaar, especially for letting your gaze wander.
3. Try not to think about the person at all.
4. Do not try to look at Mr 'Handsome' again.
6. Steer away from Mr Handsome like he is a plague.
5. Don't share your feelings with other as this will cause it to be harder for you to forget. Family and friends will tease you about it. (And you could get in trouble with your parents) Sharing your feelings could just aggreviiate the problem. (I say problem coz crushes are problems)
7. As tempting as it may be, do NOT try to catch his attention.
8. Recite لا حول ولا قوة الا بالله العلي العظيم
9. When with friends, as hard as it may be try not to discuss boys and their lives because doing so causes more interests to spark.
We will be asked about our youth and how we spent it. We should try not to spend our youth talking about guys and discussing them, it is futile to do so.
Mu'ad ibn Jabal رضي الله عنه reported that Nabi صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
"The feet of a servant will not move on the Day of Resurrection until he is asked about four matters: his lifetime and how he used it, his youth and how he exhausted it, his wealth and how he earned it and spent it, and his knowledge and how he acted upon it."
Source: al-Mu'jam al-Kabīr 111
Youth has been termed as a part of insanity due to the fact that a person -sometimes- does acts in his youth which he himself would not believe in his later years. A youngster is generally full of energy, and when expressing this, he sometimes commits insane deeds.
(Faydul Qadir, Hadith: 4928)
One day when your knight in a shining, pristine white kurta and amaamah arrives with his MashaAllah beard and sweeps you off your feet, you will look back and think I was insane. And if you discussed it you will say, I was embarassingly insane.
May Allah Ta'alah guide one and all and make it easy for us to lower our gazes. Aameen.
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