sugar〻oneshots

don't crash before we can fuck

THIS IS BASED OFF OF TWO TIK TOKS I SAW BUT I COULD NOT STOP PICTURING WOLFSTAR. DECIDED TO COMBINE THEM AND I MIGHT MAKE A FULL FIC

Remus is staring at the street, mumbling the lyrics to the song on the radio (Jessie's Girl), when Lily says, "Hey, look at these guys in the car next to us."

He blinks a few times, glancing between the wheel and the back of Lily's head before he turns slightly to see.

The guy driving has dark hair and glasses, keeps looking at them and seems slightly scared which is probably due to the fact the man in the passenger's seat is leaning over him like a lap dog.

Remus laughs slightly then goes to pay attention to his driving, but Lily grabs his arm tightly. "Remus, fucking look." He grunts slightly but does in fear of what she'll do.

As soon as he does, lap dog guy waves wildly (nearly knocking off the driver's glasses), then mouths Are you... while flicking his wrist.

Remus nearly swerves off the side of the road. Lily laughs loudly and nods on his behalf, giving a thumbs up.

Lap dog does a little dance, shaking his shoulder length hair around, then mouths I'm gay too! while pointing at himself aggressively.

Remus can only look between the road and their car as lap dog starts looking for something wildly. He finds it, ducks his head for a moment, then shoves it into the driver's hand.

They roll their window down and "Who Wants To Live Forever" by Queen is blaring so loudly Remus can feel it in the pit of his stomach.

Driver holds what Remus now knows is a paper out of the window as far as he can with one hand, the other holding the steering wheel.

"Make sure he sees it!"

"Fuck, Sirius, I am!" Driver yells over the music.

Serious? "What?" Remus yells. "Lily, pictures!"

She glances at him, then registers what he says and clumsily pulls her phone out. Remus reaches over to roll her window down while she leans out as far as she can and takes a video. By now Remus can tell the paper says something, but the wind is whipping the paper around so much he can't read it.

Then the paper flies out of driver's hand.

"James I am going to fucking murder you! That was my instagram please follow me hottie!"

Remus starts to yell back but realizes he's about to miss their exit. He swerves to the side wildly and the last thing he hears from Sirius is "DON'T CRASH BEFORE WE CAN FUCK!"