His And His Circumstances (COMPLETED)

Heartbreak

~♡~

"I like him, I don't like you."

A few casual words that I can easily count with my fingers. A short and concise explanation. P'Bar surely isn't the wordy type nor was he someone who'll sugarcoat it for you.

His words were painfully honest and cruelly straightforward.

But what do I expect? It's a rejection afterall. It's bound to hurt no matter how he said it.

While I was enveloped in excruciating pain and head splitting realization of what those words mean, I saw Gun's face lit up with the words. It's an indirect confession so he must be rejoicing inside.

It's funny how the same words can both be a balm -- healing and soothing to a person and a blade so sharp it can cut a heart to a million pieces for another.

It was the latter for me and ended up broken.

With the pain becoming unbearable every passing second, I felt the urge to drink. Not to lose myself in the alcohol though or mope around sighing and cursing my fate. None of those will help. The world won't stop and listen just because I'm hurt and broken. Instead, I just want a brief respite. A short rest and unconciousness from everything that pains me.

I just want to drown the words and forget about the world for a few hours. P'Bar's words kept coming to the forefront, repeatedly reminding me of my rejection. It hurts. So bad.

I already shed a few tears after leaving the scene earlier but the floodgate is almost breaking again.

I kept walking aimlessly after I left the convenience store to buy a few things. The cashier there kept glancing at me but was kind enough not to say a word. My eyes must've been red from crying. She also handed me a box of tissue after giving me my change. She probably guessed I'll be needing it later. I'm not sure if it's free or if it was included in what I paid for but I accepted it anyway and gave her a small smile.

When I finally sobered up from the pain a bit and had the spare time to consider my surrounding, I found myself in the middle of Rama bridge.

Going in the opposite direction from my place, even my feet are telling me going home now is a bad idea. Well how could it be otherwise when P'Bar's room is just next to mine.

Last thing I'd want to happen is for him to hear me crying.

Pausing for a while and admiring the view of the dark waters in the river below and the cool night air grazing my skin, I was strucked with a sudden desire to climb the rails.

Feeling spontaneous and courageous, I put down the bag of drinks and a few snacks. The steel barrier was a bit high but that didn't deter me. Nor the possibility of slipping and hurting myself in the process. I'm already in a lot of pain. What difference would a few more scratches do? With this twisted logic, I braved the climb.

I almost reached the top of the metal fence when I felt someone pull me down. Even here, things aren't going my way. I internally sigh and just closed my eyes.

I should have landed on the cold, hard concrete with how I was caught off guard by the sudden pull but I didn't. Instead I came down on a pair of strong arms that hugged me in a warm embrace. And somehow I felt comforted.

This isn't so bad, afterall.

***

A/N:

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9.11.20
FRI