Transgender-camren |hold|

35

Camilas pov

I'm in a hospital room with Lawrence and his family also mine, I was stood between his legs as he held me tightly.

"It's going to be okay" I whisper, he nods. I knew he was scared a lot more than his 1st surgery, but I understand this one is a lot bigger with a lot more risks.

"What happens if it goes wrong?" He asked, i shook my head

"It won't okay" I say, he nods

"But it's a really really high risk-" I cut him off with a kiss

"Shh, nothings going to happen to you, you're going to be fine" I say, he nods and the doctor comes in

"You ready?" He asked, Lawrence shook his head

"5 more minutes" he said, the doctor giggles nodding and leaves, it's the 2nd time he's did this.

"Babe, do you want this?" I ask, he nods

"Yes, I do I really do...I jus watched a lot of videos on what could happen" he mumbled, I sigh shaking my head.

"You scared yourself before doing it?" I ask, he shrugs and nods

"Baby, I promise you nothing bad will happen okay, you'll wake up and you'll be you...so do you want me to go get the doctor?" I ask, he sighed pulling me closer.

"5 more minutes" he said, I sigh and kiss his head

I look at everyone and they had sad looks

"You don't want it do you" I say, he looks at me

"I do" he said, I frown

"They why won't you let it happen?" I ask, he sighed

"I don't know" he mumbled

"Baby-" he cuts me off

"I want kids" he said, I smile softly

"Like...from me" he said, I nod

"I thought I never would but now that the chance is being taken away from me...I want them" he mumbled, I nod smiling.

"There's ways to go about that" I say, he nods

"I don't want to give birth or anything" he said, I giggle

"I'm not saying you have too, but there are other ways...you can get your eggs frozen" I say, he frowns confused.

"My what? I'm not fucking chicken" he said, we all laugh

"No...do you know how babies are made?" I ask giggling

"Yeh, a guy cums in a girl and it...it does stuff" he said, I bite my lip chuckling

"Look...I can get the doctor and he can explain everything, do you want that?" I ask, Lawrence shrugs.

"Babe, if you want kids you'll have to speak to a professional okay" I say, he nods sighing. I kiss him and walk out to go get the doctor.

"Hi, ummm, my boyfriend would like to talk to you" I say, he smiles nodding walking in

"Babe" I say, Lo looks and sighed

"Are you ready mr jauregui?" He asked, Lo shook his head

"I-...I don't...I do but like...I uhhh" he looks at me and I giggle

"He wants biological children and would like to know his opinion before he has the surgery" I say

"Oh right of course well" he goes on about the different ways

"What dude no" Lawrence said lifting his legs up to his chest, I see the terrified look on his face

"Babe, they're the ways" I say, he shook his head

"What about the one you said, the freezing thing" he said, the doctor explained

"So it's an abortion" Lo said, he shook his head

"It's different-no it's not" Lo said, the doctor nods

"No, with an abortion they do the same thing, they just don't freeze it and the egg is alive kinda" Lo said, I frown.

"I don't want that again" he said, I go wide eyed as did everyone else in the room

"Again?" I ask, he goes wide eyed

"No i-I mean like...I don't want it" he said, I look at the doctor

"Can you leave a moment?" I ask he nods, my family went with him

"Babe...what the fuck do you Mean again?" I ask, he shook his head

"Nothing" he mumbled

"Lawrence" his dad said In a warning tone

"Nothing! I didnt...it's wasn't...I..nothing" he said, I frown

"Lawrence what the fuck-Mike...dont" I whisper, I look at Lawrence who had his head on his knees in a protective way.

"I don't think...baby, did you not want what happened to you?" I ask, he gets up taking the gown off and putting his clothes back on, he walks away.

"Oh shit" Taylor mumbled, I nod

"I second that" I say, I walk after Lawrence as they all stood there in shock.

"Lolo" I call, I run after him

"Hey, hey" I grab his arm, he looks at me crying I wrap my Arms around him.

"It's okay, If you want to talk about it we can, if you don't we don't have too oaky" I say, he nods

"I'll get this whole thing rescheduled until you're ready okay, I'm sorry I just did it out of the blue, I should of talked to you...I'm sorry" I say, he just nods and holds me close and tightly.

"Can we just go" he mumbled, I nod

"Yeh, wait bu the car, I'll get everyone" I say, he nods and I walk back in getting everyone

I explain to the doctor that Lawrence doesn't want the surgery today, that'll I'll reschedule and stuff and we go.

Lawrence wanted to go to my house so we stayed in my room all day, I didn't bring up what happened and we just talked about anything else.

"Camz...when do you want kids?" I smile softly

"I kind of had this image in my head, that we'll be married with a nice house, you'll have a really cool job as I would be working in fashion design...and around like 25 we would start to get into the whole baby thing, so about 25" I say, he nods playing with my hair.

"Baby...when do you want the surgery?" I ask, he shrugs

"I don't know, it's a big big step" he said, I nod

"I know and I'm so fucking sorry I did what I did" I say, he nods with a smile

"It's fine, I honestly thought I was ready too...it's just there's little things I need to do before it happens" he said, I nod.

"I should of just talked to you...If I did this wouldn't of happened, you wouldn't of...said what you said...I'm sorry I feel so bad for pushing everything onto you and-" he cuts me off.

"It's okay, you did nothing wrong" he said, I sigh and cuddle him More

"You were just being a fucking amazing girlfriend, who else would of done all of this for me Camz? No one, even if there would be I'm glade I didn't find out, because you're the only one I want...you are my first everything and I'm so fucking happy you are because you're the one I'm meant to have" I kiss him and he kisses me back.

"Now, how about we look at that freezer thingy" he said, I laugh and he smiles

We look at the ways Lo could have kids. We also talked about it, I knew he was getting embarrassed, uncomfortable and also tired so I closed the laptop.

"Hey, we're not in a rush though are we? Let's get some sleep yeh" I say, he nods and I cuddle into him.

"I love you" he said, I peck his lips

"I love you too" I say, he holds me close and tight and we fall asleep.