Trust the Killer

Chapter Twenty Four

It was raining on the drive now, but not as heavy as the last time. I shivered as the van was chilled by the weather. I tried to hide that from Wyck, I didn't want him to come too close in this moment, I felt overwhelmed.
     My arms were still crossed over my chest, keeping myself warm as I closed my eyes and decided to drift off. My eyelids felt heavy as my head fell, I tried to keep myself from leaning on Wyck as I fell asleep.
It wouldn't take long until I'd be unconscious. That was strange for me, in cars I'd never been able to sleep, being upright was enough to keep me awake let alone the uncomfortable temperature in the van.
I thought on a few things as my mind faded. Where would Wyck get a car once in my hometown? How long with his friends stay? What murderous job did they have to do? Would he ever leave to rejoin them again, would he make me come with?
I think the tough thoughts are what knocked me out, my brain decided being unconscious was the best way to escape my unusual and confusing fate. Add that to my list of unhealthy coping mechanisms.
Once I was asleep it was a deep black sleep with short insignificant dreams I wouldn't recall once I was awake again.

        The van rattled me awake once or twice, I could here talking, the low sound of Wycks voice contrasted a higher pitch that came from Johnny. I felt my body slump back into sleep as their voices felt like a distant television and I couldn't make out the topic.

     Some time later I felt my head jolt forward and then rest back down on fabric, my eyes opened faintly and I gripped my hand around what it rested on. I noticed it was the top of Wycks leg in my hand. My head shook again as the sound of Wycks laugh filled my ears, I realized the back of my head was against his stomach as I somehow managed to fall asleep with my head in his lap. His stomach muscles tensed as he and Johnny had a conversation moving me along with it. My eyes closed feeling heavy, I felt Wycks hand resting on the side of my rib cage. I was curled up in a ball on the seat with my knees at my chest.
     "I don't know, I've never even fucking been there." Wycks voice was joking. I felt his other hand gently lay down on my head, his fingers spread through my hair.
     "You lived in Nevada but you've never been to Vegas?" Johnny mocked him.
     "Fuck no, drunk people are irritating. They're everywhere in Vegas."

I woke up a bit more to listen to the conversation, it was interesting to hear how Wyck spoke normally to his friend.
"Well, that's where we're headed after we drop you and your girl off."
I felt Wycks body tense at Johnny's statement.
"I'd go, but I gotta figure this out first."
"What are you trying to figure out, though?"
There was a pause after Johnny's question. I felt Wyck shift under me. I kept my eyes tightly closed pretending I was completely asleep.
"I- you know I really like her. I don't know what I was thinking, I just want to make sure she's alright." He seemed to beat around the bush.
"So you're gonna stay in LA to make sure she's alright, or to keep her from talking? I don't get what you're trying to do."
"I'm trying to... fuck I don't even know." Wyck laughed.
"You know, dude. You can't force her to date you if that's what you're getting at." Johnny spoke slowly.
My stomach dropped at the boldness of his claim, I anticipated the tall boys response.
He paused for a while longer. "We'll see."
His words caught me off guard, I had little time to react before Johnny and him laughed his response off. It was uncomfortable to listen to two men joke about forcing you into things you might not want. Not that I'm completely against the idea of Wyck, but it should me up to me to decide.
I heard Johnny sigh after laughing. I was surprised he was doing something other than listening to his headset but it's possible he just didn't want to talk in front of me. "I know Julia's pissed at you, but it's your choice, your life. I have other people lined up to take your spot in the mean time. I just need to know what you're thinking long term... you know you lead this group and with you gone it's me or Julia in charge and neither of us have done well at that." Johnny laughed again. "So for me it's best to have you back as soon as possible."
Wyck breathed in deeply. "Yeah, look. I don't know about long term right now. I have some shit I can do in New Orleans, but I don't know really if it's a great idea."
"You just don't think the girl will like you if you continue to do hits." Johnny stated flatly and my stomach felt sick.
Wyck seemed slow to answer again, "I don't want her to be scared of me. I mean, it's not a bad idea to move on anyway. I'll probably end up in prison if I don't stop at some point."
There was a relief in the chance Wyck wouldn't hurt people anymore. I especially felt nervous at the idea of him in prison. Is it possible I have Stockholm syndrome? I'm wishing for my captor to get away with my kidnapping and multiple murderers, there's something deeply wrong with me.
I was comforted as Wycks fingers slid through my hair, rubbing my head gently.
"I have no idea what the fuck I'd do other than this, though." His words made my stomach sink again. I felt whiplash from emotions. "I'll figure it out." Wyck spoke quietly that time. His hand caressing the side of my head with a feathery touch.
"Good luck." Johnny's voice became distant again as I felt myself drifting back into an exhausted sleep.

This time I dreamed of Wyck, his large tattooed hands holding each side of my face as we laid in a skewed version of the motel bed from last night. He kissed me gently in the dream. His lips soft and warm as they suffocated my mouth.