Can’t believe I’m actually standing in Marshall’s kitchen, his house isn’t anything like I expected it to be, it’s not vulgar or crass, not draped in gold, rather it looks like a large lived in family home. The kitchen is huge and I can see cereal boxes and sauce bottles behind glass doored cupboards.
The refrigerator he’s currently lost in is huge, you could park a bus in that thing but this house is clearly lived in.
No housekeeper or staff to greet us at the door, there is security Marshall let me inside and a huge man dressed in a black uniform appeared and disappeared just as quickly when Marshall spoke to him.
There are photos framed and hanging on the walls, photos of three different young girls taken at various stages of their lives, I guessed one of these girls must be the famous Hailie, his greatest muse when he was younger, I stood looking at a photo of the four of them laughing and all pulling silly faces on the wall while he rummaged through the fridge.
“Don’t worry they won’t just pop up unannounced” without knowing he picks up on my nerves about them appearing suddenly although it’s just past midnight so I supposed it wasn’t likely.
I smile “Your home is beautiful” and it truly is.
“Thanks, now get your ass over here and kiss me” he makes his demands and I move slowly towards him, picking up my hand I’m filled with panic. Fuck! My fucking rings how could I be so stupid and leave them on. I look up slowly and instead of the anger I expect to see he’s smiling.
“I’m not stupid little one, don’t ever mistake my living unhappily in denial for stupidity. I know about this and it makes me want to steal you” his voice sending shivers down my spine till he closes the distance and kisses me gently “Tell me, its possible”.
I close my eyes, he knows something about me I’ve tried to hide but I guess was obvious and I don’t want to tell him it’ll never happen, that I can’t leave my husband, so I sidestep the question and go for what I hope is a humorous reply “You just like the mystery, the chase. once you have me, you won’t want me any more”
Marshall shakes his head in disagreement “You want the full tour?”
“Of course I do” Answering with a big grin.
I’m dragged unceremoniously throughout the rest of the downstairs area of his home and I love it, it smells like home and feels like it too and for a moment I’m jealous that Marshall’s kids will never have to sell their cars or their horse to raise money to be able to live. I push that thought aside quickly though, it’s not their fault and it feels mean to have such shitty thoughts about people I’ll likely never meet.
Thinking about the things he’s said tonight is unsettling, that he misses me and he wants to steal me, he’s been affectionate and warm. He’s catching feelings and I can’t have that on my conscious. This will have to end soon and I don’t want it to, so badly I want to cling onto him and hold on tight, I want him to steal me, the guilt I feel over that pushes down on me and makes my chest feel tight.
“So what were you doing out tonight? Looking for man to replace me or just looking to get blind drunk” he’s smirking as he speaks trying to pass his question off as a joke but he can’t hide the hurt look in his eyes that I might have been out looking for someone to replace him.
“Well if I was I failed at both didn’t I! Actually it’s my birthday as of midnight and Jane wanted to try out that new bar” and speaking of tonight I was surely going to face quite the inquisition from Jane tomorrow. Her face when she realised ‘Mike’ was in fact Eminem was the best gift ever, I could laugh about that expression for years to come.
Asking her not to use my real name earned me a strange thoughtful look too.
