"Por qué?!" Kamaria cried as she clutched her pillow, staring at herself in the mirror. "For once just think about yourself! Just do it! They do it, so why—why can't you!"
"Kamaria open the door!" Karmen called out, her brothers on the phone as they all listened to Kamaria yell at herself.
"And I bet the moment they need help, you're gonna be the weak little pendeja you are at help them out! You're gonna put your own needs to the side for your friends and shove your feelings away because they need help!"
"Hermanita, por favor, abre la puerta."
"You're so weak! FUCK!" Shattering was heard on the other side of the door and Karmen felt her heart drop, running as fast as she could to the front desk as Kamaria continued her onslaught of breaking things out of rage.
"Bitters, BittersBittersBittersBitters!" Karmen called out rapidly, startling the man. "We need a fucking ambulance right now."
"What's going on?"
"Kamaria's having a breakdown."
"Ma'am, open the door."
"GO AWAY!" Kamaria screamed at the officers at the door, sitting in the middle of her trashed apartment and sobbing harshly. Her hands, arms, and feet were cut up from the glass she had thrown around, her head was pounding with all of the screaming and crying she was doing, and her ears were ringing. "I DON'T NEED HELP!"
"Gordita, they just wanna get you cleaned up." Karmen was trying to coax Kamaria out of her room, seeing as she changed her locks as soon as she got there so Bitters didn't have her key. "Come on, we just wanna make sure you're okay."
"I'M FINE!"
"No baby, you're hurt." Kamaria went quiet, sniffling before beginning to crawl over to the door, unlocking it. Karmen dropped down and hugged her, not caring about the blood or small pieces of glass covering her daughter. "They're taking you to the hospital to clean you up while I get someone to clean your room."
"Okay." Jennifer and Katie were walking into the building with groceries when they saw Kamaria being wheeled out, instantly turning to Karmen.
"What happened?" Jennifer asked as she covered her daughter's eyes.
"She was yelling at herself in a mirror, and she lost it." Karmen sighed heavily, dialing a number. "It's those boys of hers. They're stressing her out."
"I agree with you there." Katie said, moving her mothers hands. Jennifer rubbed Karmen's shoulder when she saw a tear go down her cheek, the woman smiling gratefully as she asked someone to come in and clean up Kamaria's mess.
"Ah, Jen!" The woman turned around, seeing her friend's conflicted look. "She...she doesn't want us to tell them."
"What? They need to know."
"She said that it'll just worry them when they need to be focused on their music. She made me promise." Karmen glanced over at Katie, the two Knight's getting the hint. "I'll be in my room showering and crying into a tub of ice cream."
"Remember, not over the ice cream." They laughed before splitting up.
"I can't believe you told your mom not to tell us! Not to tell me! Kami, if we stress you out then you can just say that!" Kendall found out from Katie that Kamaria was staying overnight in the hospital, not telling any of the other boys through his rush to get over and check on her. "The last thing I want is for you to be this stressed out!"
"Oh please, you guys care about what you want. Screw me, as long as I help you and get you to where you need to be then that's it." Kamaria grumbled, flipping through the TV channels. Kendall snatched the remote out of her hand. "You must've lost your mind. Give it back and try again."
"Is that what you really think? That I'm using you as a stepping stool?"
"No dumb ass. If you listened, I said that you guys use me to get to where you need to be. I never say you guys walk all over me to get there." Kamaria refused to look at him, even when he turned off the TV. "My feelings have been invalid for some time now."
"That's not true!"
"When was the last time you asked me how my day was? Or the last time you asked about my health, how I was feeling?" Kamaria snapped, glaring at him. "Kendall, it's been years since any of you have asked about my well-being. It's always 'Kami, can you' or 'Mom, can you make' never 'how was your day?' or 'how are you feeling?' You dickheads haven't even showed any signs of genuinely caring about my feelings!"
"Kami I have always asked about you. You're the one who shrugs me off!"
"BECAUSE THAT'S HOW IT'S ALWAYS BEEN!" She yelled, leaning forward in her bed. "NOTHING CHANGED UNTIL I TOOK YOU TO THAT STUPID DANCE! AND NOW I WISH I DIDN'T!"
"Oh yeah? And why's that!"
"BECAUSE THEN I WOULDN'T CARE ABOUT YOU FUCKERS!" She cried, Kendall's demeanor softening when she did. "That fucking night changed all of us! You started crushing on me, I started actually stepping up to help you guys out, and those other shits just got more dense! I'm tired of forgiving you guys, but it's who I am!"
"Kami, you don't always have to be so hard on yourself." Kendall said softly, sitting on the side of her bed and pulling her into a hug. She clung to him as she cried, not wanting to let go of the one person who offered her comfort. "If the others aren't there for you, then I am."
"Where the hell were you earlier." Kamaria laughed lightly as she sniffled, Kendall smiling a little.
"Thinking about how you would be lecturing me to pay attention in class."
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Badass || 𝐊. 𝗞𝗻𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁
Fanfiction"I would argue and say I'm a good influence, but today's Sunday." "Can't believe you still don't lie on Sundays. You're not even religious."
