Ruins (The Jewel Project #6)

32. Something Left to Save

Jimmy clutched his head in his hands, trying to make sense of the madness inside him. It wasn't like before, the result of too many drugs and brainwashing. This time, it was legitimate confusion and trauma after his last hours.

"Come on, say something." Billy sat across from him at Kato's small table, a tiny cup of tea between his hands.

Normal tea, because Kato had never bothered to teach them how to make the special one. They'd never dreamed he'd die. They'd never dreamed they wouldn't be doing this together. And yet, here Jimmy was, alone. Well, not alone.

"Why didn't you come earlier?" he asked, his voice low and even. "You could've saved him."

Billy winced. "I know what you're saying, but it's not like that. I'm nothing like the Agency. I just got here, and this place is not easy to find."

Jimmy could understand that. What he couldn't understand was why his cousin was there in the first place.

"So you can't tell me anything," he concluded.

"Not beyond the obvious. I just don't want to come back."

"That I can understand," Jimmy said with a nod. Hell, if he could afford to just disappear right then, he would. "What I can't understand if why you couldn't let us know you were alive."

Billy smirked. "Not like you guys ever believed I was dead."

"It still hurt us, Billy. We still missed you."

The smile slipped off his face and he bit his lip. "It's a lot more complicated, Jimmy. I wasn't even supposed to show myself to you. But after seeing what happened, knowing that everyone is in there..." He nodded in the general direction of the castle. "You can't do this alone."

"So will you be busting in with me? Reveal yourself to everyone and Snitch Gravel?"

Jimmy knew the answer even before Billy pursed his lips and shook his head. He really was doing this alone.

"No. I can't do that. Not yet. But I can be your sniper. Make sure you reach the door safely."

That was helpful, he guessed. Much better than nothing. There were so many question he should ask, but after the day he'd had, Jimmy was too exhausted. As much as he'd wanted to storm the castle as fast as possible, he knew that was no longer wise. He couldn't go in like this. He needed to sleep. Then he needed to try to channel the serum while he was awake.

"Just to make it clear," he said. "You're working for someone else now, someone who's been hiding you. But you can't say who and what you're doing."

"That's right," Billy said, his voice filled with regret. "But I will tell you someday. Because I'm sure it will come to it. Maybe now, maybe next time. Maybe later."

"Next time..." Jimmy whispered. He wasn't an idiot. He could read between the lines.

He could even half-guess who Billy was working for. But it was something he'd refused to get into. Because he hadn't wanted to pressure Jessie and it was all in due time. The last time he'd figured stuff out and rushed into it, he'd almost been killed.

"You should get some sleep," he said to Billy. "We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow. I might need your help."

Billy nodded and stood. Jimmy didn't move, trying to morph the grief inside him into something useful. That was what Kato would have wanted. Another drive, another face to help him steer the serum in the direction he needed. But as much as he reasoned his way into it, his heart still missed beats, his hands were still clammy, and the walls of the tiny house seemed to be falling on top of him.