It Can't Be Love

35

Jiwoo's POV

We came back to the dorm an hour ago, got everything packed, and after having an arguably long conversation over who was going to wear what for the evening, we finally settled for some rest. Our bodies were going to require energy for the wild dance that awaited us.

The three girls accompanying me in the dorm have finally fallen asleep giving me the chance and privacy I desperately needed.

I reach out to my wallet in which I had kept the piece of paper Taehyung had given me in the restaurant.

Taehyung's letter.

The reply that I had not expected to come in such a tranquil manner.

Letter

My love, Jiwoo

Starting the way you did, hoping that I would be equally honest.

I am trying to pour my heart out to you, the emotions I probably never expressed.

I am not as poetic as you. All I have ever done in my life was either pushing people away from me or blatantly refusing goodness to find a way to me. Both of them are pretty much the same.

For the first time in my life, I felt a sense of belonging and true happiness seeping within me. The emotions that Bangtan was pouring on me all these years, made me vulnerable to them.

You may be right Jiwoo, hurt is always painful. But I am not wrong either. It is not hurt that is happy but the acceptance behind it. Sighting that you have come to accept it makes me relieved that you are hurt, sure, but still, you will be happy.

Don't blame the stars Jiwoo. It was their conjunction that brought us together in the first place. Maybe our share of time that could be spent together has been exhausted. But it has given us unforgettable memories.

Using a slight distortion of your words, I will say the same thing. Someone in heaven is so pleased with me that they decided to reward me with you.

Thank you Jiwoo. For existing. For walking into my life. For accepting my love. For gracing me with your presence.

As much as I love to prove many of your theories about yourselves wrong, I simultaneously hate it to go against you. But let me tell you, you are not the hopeless girl from some conventional love story. You are Park Jiwoo. The strong girl with a heart so big, so kind that the wildest of waves get tamed in front of you.

Every time I saw you in the past four years, my heart fluttered like anything, skipping beats. You made me realize the human within me. You made me feel worthy of happiness. You made me believe in my galaxy. Whatever amount of gratitude I express for this, will never be enough.

You always said you don't want to hurt me. And I always replied you do not assume the power to do so.

Jiwoo, people always said, If it is not forever, It can't be love. You and I proved them wrong.

As long as it is, if it is true, It can be love.

And I truly loved you Jiwoo. I still do. As long as I can.

I also promise to respect your wish. I will not wait. I will move on. Maybe someday I will fall in love again. Get married. But you will always claim a part of my heart. As the girl who first gave me a taste of love.

You are precious.

So my dear Jiwoo, smile. Because Yoongi hyung will kill me if you cry because of me.

And thank you for everything.

You too are the best thing that ever happened to me.

Yours lovingly,

Taehyung.

End

My hands clutch the paper very tightly, crumpling its sides to a great extent. 

This is the Taehyung I love. He convinces me that there is a joy, a different kind of satisfaction in letting go. 

Even if the world is against us, I do believe in that galaxy. The one I created with Taehyung. The one that includes him. 

He has my heart and I don't think I will ever willingly reclaim it.

I love you, Kim Taehyung.

***

The evening is as wild as expected. Third-year students are staggering all around the place, ensuring perfection in their plan. 

I am wearing a black knee-length dress that has a silver ribbon for a belt. As always nothing much can be done to my hair. Kajal in my eyes is the only makeup I can endure. And I walked into the function ground meeting other of my friends.

They are stupidly staring at me as if I am looking any different.

"Tae hyung will not be able to keep eyes off you," Jihoon says, awe spread across his face.

"Yah! You are talking as if I stand out or something in this entire crowd of hot girls." I say.

"Yes, you do." We hear an ocean-deep saying as Taehyung grazes past us to join other professors.

It is enough to make me blush.

The function begins and ends in what felt like a blink of an eye. The wild party begins and I look around for the person of my interest as others move for the alcohol.

He is nowhere on the function ground. I search the entire place but can't find him. If he is not here, there is only one place where he can be.

I rush to the tank building.

"You are late." He says. His back is facing me.

"You should have told me that you will be here."

He turns around and flashes me his boxy smile. The smile I will soon be missing a lot.

"I hope I did not hurt you." He says engulfing me in a hug.

"No, you did not. Same are my hopes."

We cannot spend much time here, away from the party. It will raise suspicion.

We are looking at the sky, my hand locked in his, the thing I wanted to do on last year's farewell. 

He says after a few moments' silence "When you told me about your family on the day of our confession, I was a bit disturbed that you suffered a lot and yet smiled. I was unconsciously comparing our situations. I shared it with Yoongi hyung. He said one thing that struck me that day." 

Sufferings cannot be compared, Taehyung. There are different degrees of pain and so are different capacities of endurance. Both of you are brave in enduring the pain life inflicted upon you.

I look at him, tears already forming in my eyes.

"Yah! Don't cry. You surely want me killed, don't you?" I laugh at this through those tears.

"Promise me Jiwoo, however hard life may get, you will never give up."

"I promise."

"And, promise me, we will meet again, just once again in life, but we will."

"I promise, Taehyung. We will meet again."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

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A/n: Hey guys! So here we are at the end. This is the end, guys. I am sorry if it did not come out as you anticipated. I am also sorry that I did not warn you about it. Thank you all who walked along with me all this time. You all mean a lot to me. Please vote and share and let me know how you feel about this story. Thanks for reading guys.

Love you all!