My poetry

Twisted

Tw: Self Harm//Suicide//

Another day another cut,
Another ball of paper thrown at me as I walk off the bus,
The kids laugh as I disappear down the street,
My sleeves hide the scars that sting and run deep.

These scars are memories,
Times of tragedy,
No one to run to,
No shoulder to cry into,
No one but my lonely room,
No one but the shadows of my gloom.

I wake up the next morning, bruises on my thighs,
Must have been my dad,
He denies it, becomes mad and sly.
But I know better, I know his lies.

I get on the bus, people begin to whisper,
About the girl who wears hoodies,
When it's not even winter.

I hug myself tight, with a frown on my face,
Telling myself i'll be alright,
As soon as I get out of this place.

I run off the bus as soon as it stops,
I get to my class, but the looks never halt.
I glance up from the floor, and my eyes fill with tears,
As I see best friends practicing their cheers.

Oh, what will I do? What will I say?
Will this be my life?
Every single day?

The tardy bell rings as I stumble into class,
And my teacher looks disapproving,
Probably of the finesse I lack.

No one to hug,
No one to see,
My eyes fall to the floor as I wonder what I could be.

A tug of my hoodie makes me snap out of my thoughts,
It's just the school bully with his smirks and his taunts.

He pulls off my jacket with a smirk on his face,
But soon everyone is gasping,
But I feel dazed.

My breath starts to speed,
I can't seem to relax,
My heart seems to be sped up to the max.

I run to the bathroom, all I can do is sob,
And the counselor comes there,
Thinking the problem is one she can solve.

My vision goes blurry as I pull out some scissors and cut,
Soon I pass out, as I think 'just my luck'

However, when I wake up,
I realize it was all a dream.
I remember that i'm the popular girl,
Who gets away with every scheme.

I gasp as I think of the lonely girl I bullied.
Could my dream be her life?
I run to school with full speed,
My blood pumps with strife.

I have to apologize,
Make amends and be wise.

As I get to school, everyone looks sullen.
I ask around, wondering what's going on.

I turn to the girl's only friend,
And with tears in her eyes, I couldn't believe what she'd said.

"With grief and dread, Bella jumped off the hall squire bridge,
In her suicide note,
She mentioned-insisted that you are forgiven.
But you made her squander her existence. and in this instance..I think that's twisted."