Ever since Y/N joined the bau, Reid has found a way to make her life a living hell. He doesn't understand her nor wants to, not until he overhears a conversation which makes him think otherwise. She isn't a quiet, genius FBI agent, she has problems...
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SUICIDE HOTLINE: 800-273-8255
warnings: mentions of self harm and alcohol
Relapsing has always been something on your mind, ever since you began your road to sobriety. Not many people have been supportive, though.
It's never been "if" you relapse, it's always been "when" you relapse. It's foolish to you. And the sad part is, Raven was the first one to tell you.
You understand that she was being honest with you, but she would continually tell you the same thing, accompanied with the murderous smile laid upon her face. She seemed odd to you, so you left that therapy group and joined a different one.
After leaving the rather toxic group, you continued your road to sobriety. And now, it's officially been five months since you've touched alcohol. You find yourself to be lucky as hell to be apart of the small percentage of people who succeed in staying clean.
But maybe the reason you haven't touched alcohol is because, well, you've been doing something else when troubling times come your way.
And if Spencer finds out, you think he'll go insane.
Albeit the hurt resonating inside of you, you try your best to put on a face for the team. You've been okay, maybe somewhat confused about your emotions, but you've been okay.
Emily has left you little to any paperwork this morning, which surprised you at first glance when you walked in, but then you realized why. You're five months into recovery.
You finished the stack quite quickly, and even went on to finish some of Luke and Tara's. You spin in your chair, your vision becoming blurred quickly.
You come to a stop and you turn slowly, your eyes flicking up to see Spencer standing over you. He seems happier than usual, due to recent events. You didn't tell him, but he had a calendar.
You purse your lips, choosing to stay silent. You've been distant recently and instead of spending your weekends at his, you've been spending them at yours- alone. You would go to Emily's, but she has things to do and disturbing her peace is something you'd rather not take part in. But the thought is tempting. Her place is rather calm and nowhere do bad memories flood in.
"Five months," he says in a giddy tone. The expression that swifts across his face cracks your bones, making you weak.
Lying to him is something terrifying, and that's why you've chosen to stay distant. You should be able to talk to Spencer about whatever the hell's been going on, and you're sure you can, but you don't want to disappoint him.
You nod. "Yeah, excited," you respond plainly.
His eyebrows scrunch together, concern lacing his lips by the way they turn down. He sets the small cupcake in hand on your desk, his movements slow. "Is something wrong? Did you-"
