Chasing Shadows (Jaylor Fanfiction)

Biological Didn't Bother

March 4th; 2024
One Month Later
Olivia Flower's Point of View
Dear diary,
            I'm very close to my 2nd trimester which is terrifying as hell I have to admit. In a couple of days it'll officially be week 13. I've also developed a bump on my abdomen. Nothing too big but it's enough to bring me joy. I love the tiny bump. It reminds me of the baby and I can feel closer to them. Beforehand I knew I was pregnant but now it's like I can see it happening. Also, since when has this turned into a pregnancy journal? I mean, I don't have much else to write about. All this spare time has gotten me thinking about everyone in my life. I want to meet my biological father. I know I have met him a couple times but they were so long ago I don't even remember. I want to meet him and actually remember. I want to tell him that he's going to be a grandfather and maybe if he's nice, he can be involved. I love my dad but I've always wanted to have my biological dad in my life. You can't blame me for being curious? Taylor has always been telling me to stay away but what if he's changed? Plus, my mom has to be somewhat bias. She's had hatred for him for 17 years. Maybe it's time for them to reconcile or they can become indifferent. I want to meet my dad for once in my life on good terms. Just sit down with him and talk.

Sincerely,
Olivia

I get out of my bed and toss my journal on my desk but miss miserably and it falls on the ground. I shrug and ignore the fact it's on the ground and just walk downstairs anyway. I look around, trying to find Taylor but my hunt comes to an end when I hear her walk through the front door. I walk towards her and she puts her purse on the entry table. She looks at me with dark circles under her eyes and reeks of weary bones.

"Hey. How are you?" My tone is perky and the opposite of anything Taylor would propose.

"What is it you need?" She reads me and assumes my dialogue like the way she analyzes a song.

"I want to meet my dad...my biological dad." I spill.

"No." She speaks firmly and walks away slowly, carrying a small paper white bag with her.

"That's it? No?"

"Olivia, today is not a good day to start something with me. Can we just do this a different day?" Her voice seems drained with frustration beginning to accompany it.

"If not now, then when?" I ask.

"Ask me a day when I feel like I'm awake. Ask me when I don't feel like if I shot myself, I'd be more alive than dead!" She slightly snaps.

"You feel like that every day so I'm pretty sure that day will never come."

"You're not going to let this go." She mutters to herself before turning around, finally giving in.

"I'm not."

"Okay, fine. Olivia, your father is an asshole. If you try and meet him, all he'll do is hurt you. Sometimes is better to remain curious your entire life rather than getting hurt."

"How do you know that he's still like that? He could have changed!"

"People like him don't change! He's only tried to take custody of you to piss me off! He didn't want you, he wanted me. He wanted to control me. If you go see him, he'll add you as a pawn to his chessboard to use against others."

"Maybe you two can get together and talk it out. Stop hating him maybe."

"I don't hate Calvin, hating him takes too much of a toll. I'm just indifferent at this point. I've buried the hatchet."