this is where it all begins...

dogs.

I love dogs. I have had several.

But if your dogs

bark

at

dust

and

you

know

that

but

don't

do

anything

to

shut

them

up...

I swear to gOD I will do something.

To you.

And your family.

It aggravates me.

Rude dogs in general aggravate me.

I have always had mild tempered, mannered, behaved dogs. Why? "Oh because of their breed/personality."

Negative, Ghost Rider.

Because we taught them that. I have had a:

1) blue heeler mix

2) Australian shepherd-blue heeler

3) boxer-blue heeler

4) Chihuahua-rat terrier-Jack Russell mix.

Yes, all mutts. All breeds that usually don't shut up.

Did they bark? Yeah, but not at everything! (One did but she was really protective and once we yelled at her to be quiet she was.)

My Chihuahua-mix dog isn't even aggressive like she probably should be!

And if I'm at your house, and I'm eating dinner, and if your dog gets on me, or the table...I'm not going to play it off like it's okay.

Because it isn't okay. Okay???????????

I don't want dog hair in my lasagna. You feel me??????

Story time:

I once had this friend, and I went to her house. I knew her dogs were aggressive and just all around not cool. So not cool they had to lock them in a different room so they didn't attack you. I, as a cool, calm, and collected dog owner/handler knew what the safe thing was if they weren't locked in said room.

Don't enter the house until friend invites me. Don't antagonize the dogs. Hold palm out without making eye contact and let the dogs welcome you before walking out the entry way. I know this shit.

So, (we'll call her Lucy) Lucy invites me in, and dogs bombard me. Two little yapper things and a big (aptly named) Bear. His name is Bear. He was usually the calm one. It was those little fucks I had to keep an eye on. (I'm watching you, small dogs.)

I stand there, palms out. The little dogs scratch up my legs bc I'm in shorts and it's summer time and I can, but are okay.

Then.

Out of nowhere. Comes Bear.

This asshole charges me, knocks me against the front door, and bites my leg.

What does Lucy say? (I shit you not.)

"He didn't bite you! He ran at you with his mouth open!"

*calmly throws Lucy off a cliff*

Bitch my leg bled. And bruised. People noticed. And you tell me he didn't bite me?!

Oh. it gets better, folks.

"Hes bitten other people before. And it's been worse."

What.

What.

What?!

DUDE YOUR DOG HAS ISSUES.

I didn't press charges. I should've. But...she was my best friend at the time.

....it has ruined my trust in all dogs I know. Including mine. Which sucks because I know some really cool dogs, and they've all been super sweet forever. And...now...there's times where I'm afraid to even have my little Bella girl run up to me.

Pic up top is the wound a day or two after the incident. Meaning, it got worse. I was just too stupid to take more pictures. It isn't on my ass btw. It's like the side of my upper thigh. The angle and how I held my shorts makes it look much more sexual than it is.

Just...train your Damn dogs. And if they bite a non-threatening guest...do something about it.

Peace. 

Oh. And her and I no longer speak. And I'm never deleting that picture. Ever.