How To Love You

Twenty Seven

Be prepared for a horrible chapter lol.

Sean wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, gently rubbing her arm. Despite the heaviness in her stomach, it fluttered at the feeling of her body pressed against his. She sunk into the warmth of his side, appreciative of the simple gesture. His touch made the room warmer somehow, her future within its walls seeming a little less bleak.

'Sit down?' Sean questioned softly, twisting the ends of her curls between his fingers. Kaycee wanted nothing more than to leave, run back home and stay in her bed with her supportive friends comforting her. But leaving also meant, having to look at him which meant having him witness her tear stained cheeks and puffy eyes and she couldn't do that right now.

She shook her head against his chest, trying to answer with words but only a croak came out.

'Okay' he tucked his face into the crook of her neck, wrapping his arms gently around her delicate body.

The clock hanging on the wall ticked, the hands on it telling Sean the length of time the two were standing wrapped in each other's embrace. The black haired boy tilted his face, placing his lips close to her ear before whispering apologies repeatedly into it.

'Stop, Lew' she mumbled, after he murmured what would have been his hundredth apology. 'That's enough'.

'I really am sorry' he loosened his grip around her, pulling away lightly. The brunette stayed pressed to his chest. 'I'm sorry' he held onto her shoulders, using his middle and index finger to tilt her chin up to meet his gaze.

The girls' eyes were green but not the kind of shade that's easy to describe. It was almost like they were both green and brown at the same time, with hints of a yellow tint creeping in around the edges as if it were trying to take over. She blinked and the beauty was momentarily covered by the shields of her eyelashes; naturally long and soft looking. By the time Kaycee's eyes opened again, a tear slid down her cheek. It was a stare that communicated her former pain, and her wish to move on. 

'Stop making me sappy, Lew' she pulled her sleeves down past her wrist, dabbing them at her eyes.

Sean slid his hand around to grab onto her wrist, leading her to sit on the couch. The sofa sank as the two sat down together, Sean immediately wrapping his arm around the girls shoulder and once again bringing her into his chest.

Except this time, she pulled away-inching away from him as she rubbed her puffy eyes. 'Yeah-I'm fine, now. Thanks' she mumbled.

'Could we continue talking about this or?' Sean fiddled with his fingers nervously.

'What else is there to loose?' The brunette hummed, using her drawstrings as a distraction.

Sean nodded his head. 'Um-I'm sorry...' he started, scratching the back of his enck nervously. He really didn't know what to say.

'Yeah, you've only said that like a million times' Kaycee whispered, a dry chuckle falling from her lips. How she was acting so calm now was beyond Sean's knowledge.

'Yeah-yeah...' he slumped back onto the couch, pulling his hood over his head. 'I'm really sorry, Kaycee. The way I acted back then was horrible. I shouldn't have ignored you, I shouldn't have acted like I didn't know you...but I've grown. I know my mistakes and I know that I hurt you-more than I even realized.  I was always prone to doing dumb mistakes, but I never really cared. But hurting you is something I- I'm sorry for...more than words.  It's the toughest times in life that show you what is important to you. And losing you definitely proved me both. I'm sorry for all I have done, and I hope you can forgive me. Whether that's today or I the next year. Just one day...' Sean croaked out, tears bubbling up in his throat.

Silence fell over them, Kaycee doing everything possible in her power to avert his gaze and Sean eventually sighing and turning away from her.

'Did you really mean it, though?' Kaycee blurted out. 'I know I was slightly...weird... but that doesn't mean I wanted you telling everyone that I was a weirdo'.

'I don't even know, Rice. I wouldn't mean it at this age but I don't know what  I was thinking back then. All I know is that I miss you.' He turned back to face her, pressing his tongue into the inside of his cheeks as he took both of her hands in his. 'That is if you couldn't tell by me wanting to be with you every second' he dryly chuckled. 

His soft lips stretched into a smile but it didn't quite reach his dark eyes. They were lit with sadness, and the forced expression of the contrary on his mouth would have looked comical to Kaycee if it didn't make her heart feel heavy. For a few moments, the brunette glanced between their hands and his face-almost sure his expression mirrored hers.

Kaycee attempted to pull her hands away, but he held on tighter, soothing her nerves by rubbing his thumb over her palm.

'I mean, I am pretty irresistible' the petite girl joked, looking down at their clasped hands.

Sean laughed. 'That you are'. 

Kaycee took the time to examine his face. Examine how much it had changed since then. He had tousled dark hair, which was thick and lustrous-nothing new. His eyes were a mesmerising deep shade of brown with flecks of silvery light performing ballets throughout. His face was strong and defined, perfected with his well-defined, angular jaw. He had dark eye brows, which sloped downwards in a saddened expression. 

His usual playful smile had drawn into a hard line across his face. His perfect lips ripe for the kissing. His muscular hands held Kaycee's as he stared deep into her eyes. She couldn't help but blush. 

Within a minute or so of witnessing the girls tinted cheeks, a smile etched its way back onto his lips. 'Blushing Kaycee is one of my favourite sights' he joked, moving closer to the girl.Kaycee shuffled backwards but it seemed to be that she was already as far back since her back made contact with the side of the sofa.

Sean moved his hands out of Kaycees, wiping them on his trousers before cupping the girls cheeks gently. 'I'm sorry, Kayc. I'm so so sorry' he whispered, leaning his forehead against hers. 'I'm sorry for ignoring you, calling you names, never telling you about my family, never acknowledging you the way you deserved...and I'm sorry for never caring for you the way you did to me'.

Kaycee's heart beat quickened as his hair tickled her forehead. 'It's okay, Lew. It's okay'.

'Just tell me what I have to do... How do I learn how to care for you?'

AN|

Hey guys! How are y'all?

I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter!

I doubt this is how any of you guys expected this chapter to go-cuz this isn't what I planed out to happen either- and you guys are probably disappointed by this. But honestly, writing this chapter was the hardest thing to write so far. To be able to make their emotions and feelings realistic was a real struggle for me. And I know I didn't fully explain their back story and what happened-and honest to God I did try. I wrote a flashback to happen at the start but it just didn't fit well with the rest of the story so I had to scrap it.

I guess I'll just include their back story as this story goes on. Sorry guys.

QOTD: Positivty Free Write.

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