^Devil May Care^ Scott Summers

^i'm...different^

empty: olivia o'brien

yeah, i'm fucked up but i don't wanna be
i wonder if i'm good enough
———
1978

"Are you alright, darling?"

Maxine popped her head up from her knees to see who was talking to her. It was a man with floppy brown hair that came above his shoulders, bright blue eyes and a light grey suit. He was sat in a wheelchair, sitting at the front of her alleyway. He gave her a soft smile when he talked.

"I'm fine, sir. Please g-go away." She tucked herself even further into the corner of the alley, her back pressed against to buildings. It was dark, almost two in the morning and it was starting to drizzle. The only things lighting the streets were the lamps and building lights. It was a surprise to see anyone out on the streets of San Francisco at this time.

The voices in her head getting louder and louder. It had never been like this. It was like this when she first got her powers but nothing like this had happened since and she couldn't stop it. Her body was shaking, her horns and tail wouldn't go away this time, her eyes and hair either. She was scared. Scared that someone would find her. Hurt her. Take her away for what she was.

"Are you sure? I'm sure your cold from the rain." He asked again, now making her notice his accent.

'Kill him. Make him stop. You have power. Use it.' The voice hissed inside her head as her eyes filled with tears. She shook her head furiously, whispering 'no' to herself as she almost forgot the man was there at all. Maxine didn't notice the man wheeling towards her before he was right in front of her.

"No, no, I-I'll kil-" Her trembling voice was cut off by her own gasp when she heard his voice in her head, calm and collected, "You want the voices to stop, don't you?"

She looked up at him in shock before nodding frantically, "I-I can't—They won't—They want me to—I-I can't do it.." She was filled with so many emotions that she couldn't get the words out. He nodded sympathetically.

"My name is Charles Xavier. I am a mutant like you. I can help you. I want to help you. Will you let me?" Maxine nodded at him and held out her hand to him, not knowing if this was appropriate at the moment or not.

"I'm Maxine.."

***

She looked out the window of the sleek black car at the overgrown mansion, driving down the pebble path. It was beautiful. She helped Charles out of the car and into his wheelchair as she admired the building.

As Maxine gazed up at the mansion, she couldn't help but think to herself that she didn't belong here. She was a monster. She could, she has hurt people, killed people. Maxine can't control herself or the voices. She didn't belong around others.

"What do you think?" Charles asked as he rolled up to the school but Maxine stayed where she was.

"I shouldn't stay here. I can't stay here." She said, fiddling with her fingers.

He looked at her before a second and clasped his hands in his lap, "Okay..why not?"

"I don't belong in a place like this." Maxine said simply, looking up at him from her hands.

"And why's that?"

"People fear the strange and unusual. I, myself, am strange and unusual." She let her little red horns and spilt tail out to make her point.

Charles chuckled softly and said with a smile, "So am I. So are kids at this school. You're not alone anymore, Maxine."

"I'm...different, Mr. Xavier. I shouldn't be around others. I-I can't control...this energy inside me. I-I've hurt too many people." She started rubbing her hands together and running the tip of her tongue over the bottom of her teeth, nervous habits. She wasn't always like this.

Before she got her mutation, she was confident and a rebel. Breaking the rules and boundaries that her mother had built to make her into the perfect bride. But after, she crumbled into a broken shell of her once self, scared of making an mistakes or or letting people get too close.

He must have sensed her nervousness as he wheeled back closer to her. Charles let out a quiet sigh before saying, "Everyone has the power to hurt anyone, by accident or not. It's how you use it that defines you."

"B-But the voic-"

"Maxine, is it your voice? That you hear in your head?" His voice got a little softer as he spoke to her.

Maxine thought about his question for a second. She had never thought about the voice either than wanting to get rid of it. It wasn't her, no, it was deep and unknown. The monster inside the core of her powers, the roots of her horns and tail.

"No, Mr. Xavier."

"Then it shouldn't have any power over you. Only you can make the decisions that shape yourself. Not anyone else," He smiled at her when her eyes looked back up at him, "So how about this: if you walk through those doors with me, I will help you learn how you control it; embrace it. And if not, I will take you back to San Francisco and you can come back when you are ready."

She looked at him for a second with an unreadable expression before chuckling sadly to herself. "You don't even know me, Mr. Xavier." Maxine said.

"Maybe not, but, I do know a good person when I see one. And trust me, you are one, even if you don't realize it yet."

Maxine studied him, looking for any signs of deception and lies, but there was nothing except truth. Part of her hoped that he was right about her.

"I'm ready."

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