It's December 24 and Tay is in his room waiting for 12 am. It's almost Christmas and time really flies so fast. It's been 2 months since Aira and New became official. 2 months of pain and agony for Tay.
Whenever New is with them, he tends to bring Aira. He wants them to grow closer with each other. OffGun and Tsy welcomed her to thru group and they never let her feel that they didn't want her. She's sweet and caring and they adore her, even Tay. He cares for her, he cares for anyone that is loved by Newwie.
His parents are at work and it's usually like this every Christmas, but they're together every New Year. His parents always make sure that they'll be home on New Year's Eve.
The clock struck 12 and he received a text from Off. Asking him if he wants to hang out. He politely declined because he knows that Off and Gun will be together. He wants them to enjoy their quality time together.
He decided to open his YouTube app and clicked the song on his recommendations. It's nice and he lied on his bed while listening to it.
The next song reminded him of New.
"Santa, tell me if you're really there
Don't make me fall in love again
If he won't be here next year
Santa, tell me if he really cares
'Cause I can't give it all away
If he won't be here next year"
They're together every Christmas. They just want to be together, but it's different this time. He's alone but he doesn't want to go out either.
Things really did change. It will always change, he just needs to accept it.
His phone vibrated, signalling that there's a notification. It's a notification from Instagram, New posted a photo and it's a photo of him and Aira.
His heart clenched upon seeing the smiling faces of New and Aira. It's painful.
Last year, they're together. Right now, he's alone and New's with the lass that she loves. Tragic.
He tried to sleep but he just can't. His mind will just wander off to Newwie.
He sat in front of his study table and decided to grab a pen and a piece of paper.
He started to write everything that comes to his mind. He stopped when he notice that he's in his third paragraph right now. He read what he had written because he doesn't really have an Idea, he just wrote all the words in his head.
Painful. After reading the sentences and paragraphs, tears started to stream down his face. It's like what he wrote slapped him and it told him over and over again that New will never love him back and they'll never happen.
It's getting harder to swallow the pain in his chest and it's getting painful everyday.
If only he got the courage to confess, he would've done it a long time ago. But he's too afraid to lose their friendship.
He's afraid that New might get mad at him and will avoid him. He's afraid of losing him.
Maybe someday, he'll tell New about it.
He received a text from Newie at 3 am. New apologised to him and that he feels a bit sad that they can't be together right now.
With tears in his eyes and with a heavy heart, he still replied that it's okay and that he understands.
Lies. He's good at lying but even though he's good at it, he can never lie to himself.
He can deceive his friends that they're fine but he can never deceive himself.
He held the piece of paper once again and he read it over and over again.
He fold the paper and placed it between the pages of his notebook.
He needs to keep it safe, the piece of paper that contained all of his thought. The piece of paper and knows what he's feeling.
YOU ARE READING
A Letter To You | TayNew
RandomIn which Tay loved new with all of his heart but New just wants Tay as his friend and nothing more, so Tay told New what he wanted to say by a letter, and he gave it to him on New's wedding day. A TayNew Light novel
