Third Love's The Charm [PUBLISHED]

Chapter Thirty-Five: Rest Easy

He blinked rapidly towards me, trying to let the words sink in. Maybe he guessed before that there was more to my father's death than what was public knowledge, but he never thought that it was going to be this.

Trust me, when I first found out I couldn't even stomach the thought of speaking to mom or going back to his grave. Mom did beg for forgiveness, but you have to understand that I was a teenager who was suffering with her own demons as well. Of course, I wasn't the type to hold a grudge against my mother for something like this.

However, I was overdramatic for a while before I allowed myself to sit down and have a proper conversation with her.

And I was angry at my father. It wasn't right, but I was so confused and hurt that I didn't know what to do. I had no idea how to process everything so my sadness turned into anger.

Then finally, guilt.

I felt guilty for thinking he was selfish. I felt guilty because perhaps I wasn't a perfect enough daughter to make him stay.

That messed me up so much.

Even to this day, all I could feel was guilt. What could I have possibly done wrong?

Scratch that, I didn't do anything at all. That was why he left us.

"I found out on Pat's birthday," I told him, slowly picking out the grass to occupy my hands, "I went into mom's room so I could borrow a pair of earrings from her and I found a letter that was addressed to me."

It had my name on the envelope and everything. Of course, I was curious and so I took it. I opened it and the contents shocked me to the core. Nothing was the same ever since.

"He wrote it before he did the car crash. I wasn't supposed to know about it until I was eighteen or at least until mom knew I could handle the truth."

Sadly, I couldn't. It happened literally almost two months after the incident at the party, I was still shaken by it and was heavily relying on my pills to keep me stable. Anybody could tell that I wasn't ready for that kind of information.

And according to Leon, it was one of three major factors that pushed me to the edge.

He wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pulling me closer to him, making me rest my head on his shoulder, "It's okay if you can't tell me more."

But I wanted to.

So I took shaky breath, taking his other hand and squeezing it as a way of comfort for me. Instead of talking to him, I went ahead and turned my attention back to the tombstone, "Hey dad, I hope you don't mind if I tell him everything."

And as if he truly heard me, the wind started to pick up and a few fallen leaves landed itself onto our laps. I could almost hear his voice, a sound I dearly missed, whisper into my ear in approval.

"It's okay, sweetheart."

Dad, I love you. You have shown me what it's like to be treated well and while I have a few slip ups every now and then, the fact that I've dated Pat and Leon – who were the sweetest guys you will ever meet – just goes to show that he taught me well.

"That letter broke me." I said to him.

Dear Avery,

Sweetheart, I know this letter might come as a shock to you but I trust that your mother gave it to you because she thought that you were ready. Before everything, I just want to say that I love you. From the moment I first held you in my arms that day in the hospital, I knew that every single breath I take will be dedicated to you. Please don't ever doubt that I loved you because every day of my life, I wanted to show you the kind of love you deserve to get.