chapter 17

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notes: sorry for the sad stuff last chapter...hate to say it doesnt get better.



Tubbo stared at his ceiling, tears running down the side of his face.

He kept thinking to himself that maybe he was too hard on Dream. Just a minute ago he came up here all angry and now he was crying. He was listening to the soft hum of his PC. Every few seconds he got a notification from Discord or Twitch.

Tubbo got up and walked to his window. His window faced the front of his house. Tubbo saw a car pull up to his house. A few seconds later Clay walked out and got into the car. The sight of his brother pained him.

A soft knock came from the door. 

"Toby?" It was his mom. "Hey, are you okay?"

Tubbo's sadness quickly turned to anger. He realized that it wasn't all Dream's fault. His mom kept this from him too.

"Toby, honey. Can I come in?" She asked.

He turned around and walked to his door. "No."

"No?" His mom sounded confused.

"You heard me. I said no." Tubbo's tears of sadness turned into tears of anger. "Don't act innocent, Mom. You knew about Clay. Yet you didn't tell me. 16 almost 17 years I've had a brother and didn't know. You could've told me."

"I know. I'm sorry."

That phrase was becoming a little too repetitive for Tubbo.

"You're sorry?" His tears felt hot on his skin. "Well that doesn't change anything, does it?"

His mom said, "No, but I'm still sorry."

"Bye, Mom. I want to be alone." Tubbo backed away from the door and sat on his bed.

His moms footsteps grew faint as she walked away. Tubbo let out a sigh and laid back down on his bed. Hours passed as he thought about what had happened. He couldn't bring himself to tell Tommy or anyone what happened. Tubbo rarely got angry, and when he did, he hated the aftermath. He hated explaining to people what happened. He didn't like reliving any moments that weren't his best.

Another knock came from his door.

"Mom, I said I want to be alone."

His door opened only it wasn't his mom that opened it.

"Tommy?"

Tubbo was worried that he was seeing things. He had been crying, and he had been laying on his bed for hours. Maybe he was dreaming?

"Yeah." Tommy said. His voice was softer, and more careful than usual. Like he was walking on eggshells. "Your mom told me everything."

"What? When?" Tubbo thought he would've known if Tommy were here.

Tommy met his eyes. "Your mom invited me. I got here about 30 minutes ago. She explained everything when I got here."

"Oh."

Well that's fine, at least I don't have to explain, Tubbo thought to himself.

"Can I give my input on the situation?" Tommy asked.

Tubbo shrugged. "Sure."

"Okay, well. I think you have the right to be mad. But I also think you shouldn't be mad forever."

He got caught on that word.

forever

The last thing he had said to dream was 'You know that part where you said you couldn't lose me forever? Well, you just did.'

Tubbo's heart filled with regret.

Tommy continued. "If I were you, I'd be mad too. But I'm not you, so I don't really fully understand how big this is. All I know if that you have to forgive them. Not now, but eventually. Trust me Toby, your mom sounded sorry. And I'm sure Dream feels bad too."

"Yeah, he did sound upset now that I think about it. I was just yelling at him. I think he was crying when he left." Tubbo said to Tommy - but mostly to himself.

Tubbo felt upset. Not at Dream or his mom- but at himself. He was still angry at them but he realized he went too far.

"Oh god." Tubbo said. "I have to tell him I'm sorry."

Tommy looked at Tubbo. "Yeah, but cool off first. You're still angry."

The more Tubbo thought about it, the more he realized that Tommy was right. He knew if he saw Dream again, he would be angry. He would most likely start yelling again. 

"You're right." He looked at Tommy and smiled.

He was glad to have a friend like him.

"Okay, come on. Let's go get something to eat." Tommy got up and gestured for Tubbo to follow him.

"As long as I get to chose where we go." Tubbo followed him out of the door.



notes: IM SORRY


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