𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘-𝐒𝐈𝐗

275 26 12
                                    

TWENTY-SIX

( TRIGGER WARNING )

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        The wave of blood that rushed through her veins turned cold, and she could even feel it touch the interiors of her own skin. Her fingers trembled when she lifted a trembly hand to pinch the skin of her arm in hopes of snapping herself back to reality, because this was just a dream.

This was all just part of a realistic dream that laid out right in front of her and she could not wait to open her eyes so she could wake up and escape this false reality.

Everything was blue once again.

       She noticed the streetlights that produced a yellowish light, started to turn on one by one. The crickets rubbing their scrappers together to form noises amidst the sound of nothing. Distant sounds of car wheels that rubbed against the cement grounds, running over the minuscule pebbles and insects that were positioned at the wrong place and at the wrong time.

She could see the clouds that turned grey against the sky that bled with dull blues. The loud barks of the dog that lived a few houses away from where they were. The light crunch of her rubber soles stepping on dried leaves that lay lifeless in the middle of the sidewalk.

Lifeless. That was all it was.

Sayo could see every single detail down to its very core that touched the inner-most curious parts of her mind that always wandered and wondered. She could see and hear everything from the sound of the car engines that she did not even know who its owner was, down to the streetlights that she was not sure when it was first ever placed there.

She felt like she could see everything, hear everything – and everything, but feel at this moment.
Sayo chuckled as she opened the recent message that had just popped up on her screen. It was quite hilarious, really – that only a few seconds ago, she felt high of happiness when she sees the smile on Shinsuke's face and the reason for his smile was because of her. Her chuckles turned into quiet laughs as her shoulders shook, dropping her heavy arm down and leaving the message on read.

Shin-chan: Stay safe. Please greet Maria-san for me as well.

She shook her head and tilted her head downwards, feeling her lips quirk up to form a forged smile that tried to mimic the ones she did when she was happy. She lifted her head up and felt her heart throb when she stared up at the sky that looked down at her, and soon enough, she could feel liquid drop down over her face and drip to the side of her head.

She smiled when her vision started to blur, with the grey clouds turning into blobs of greys that looked like the ones she painted in her preschool years. It was all blurry, and she was not sure if it was from the rain that started to grow or if it was just her eyes that started to sting when reality knocks her over as she hears the sound of sirens blare over her ears.

"S-Sayo!"

       The familiar sound of her aunt's voice called out, her voice cracking towards the end as she yelled her name. Sayo tilted her head down to look away from the sky, staring at the red hues surrounding the line of her under eyes; they looked like they were aggressively scratched.

Sayo breathed in deeply and ignored their neighbors who stood outside of her mother's home, some of them had their hands over their mouths and some of them were whispering. She smiled and greeted her aunt normally, "Hello, Mama."

She greeted her normally because that was how she would greet her normally ever since she was younger – she would always call her aunt, 'Mama'.

Rose immediately grabbed for Sayo, bringing her to wrap her arms tightly around her body as if she was going to crack. Sayo could feel the tears threaten to leak out of her corners of her eyes once again, but then again, perhaps it was just the rain falling and dripping down her skin.

"Why are you crying, M-Mama?" Sayo questioned, feeling her throat close in causing her to choke slightly towards the end. Her arms lay limp right beside her as her phone buzzed, though she ignored it even when the rain started to damage it.

"I-I'm so sorry, Sayo... I'm so sorry." Rose cried harder, clutching the back of Sayo's uniform tightly in her hands.

"Why are you apologizing?" She asked quietly, her eyes averting to the ground then at the multiple people that stared at her with pity projecting through the looks in their eyes.

Why were they doing that? She did not need their pity. There was nothing to give pity for.

"Y-Your mother, Maria, she-"

Sayo cut her off with a chuckle, causing Rose to pull away and stare at her worriedly. Her chuckles transitioned into breathy laughs that escaped her lips along with the ache in the back of her throat and chest, like vapors clogging itself inside of her lungs at the breathlessness. Her wheezy laugh slowly contorted into sobs as she tilted her head upwards, only to be staring at the same sky once again.

"I know." She choked out quietly and her aunt could only watch.

       She repeated, "I know."

       I'm sorry Shinsuke, but I can't greet my mother for you today, or tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that. Eternity could pass by, but she would still not be present for me to ever greet her once again.

      Sayo pulled herself away in front of her aunt, heading towards the direction of their – her house now, because she was going to be alone. She passed by her mother that was laying over the stretcher with the paramedics hurriedly performing CPR, and for a second, she caught a glimpse of her mother's face.

       It was pale with her lips dried and lost its pinkish hue, but despite that, the corners of her lips were still curled up slightly.

       She tried to head towards her but one of the paramedics stopped her.

       "Please stay away from her for the time being as they continue to perform CPR." His blank voice stated, though it held a bit of softness that was probably afraid that she was going to start bawling there.

       She opens her mouth to protest but stops, closing it once again. She shook her head and inched away, ripping her eyes away from the paramedic who stared at her back in surprise as she dragged her feet towards the front door of her house. Her trembly hand grasps the cold metal knob and twists it, pushing it open then standing by the doorway.

       Their small house was left the way it was this morning, except there was a broken mug by the kitchen floors as well as spilled tea.

       She could not pull her lips up to smile when she quietly says amidst the empty and lifeless house, "I'm home."

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i hope i projected her
feelings well enough!
don't be shy to give
comments :>

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