Some of you may want to skip this rant. I am just warning you that this rant has no humor at all in it and is probably the most serious rant I will ever make and could potentially be triggering goodbye
UPDATE 2/20/15- hey guys i just realized that one of my FAV youtubers Lacigreen has made a video about 50 shades, so if you're interested in this topic feel free to watch the video I linked :)
-
I am SO heated right now
I just got in this argument with this girl over the pile of shit writing that is 50 shades of abuse and I'm so infuriated I am actually shaking.
I'm just gonna start by saying I hate 50 shades of grey. (If you couldn't tell already)
I have read some of the first one (but stopped bc I wanted to vomit) and I definitely won't see it in theaters to support this shitty ass franchise that is giving out wrong information about BDSM.
Basically if you don't know. this book is centered around making out a man who is a stalker, controlling, manipulative, and abusive to seem like a sad little puppy dog who just needs to be loved.
The girl I was fighting with told me that he was controlling and manipulative, but not abusive
???
BEING CONTROLLING AND MANIPULATIVE IS BEING ABUSIVE. BEING ABUSED ISNT JUST BEING PUNCHED WTF
Everyone needs to understand that emotional abuse is just as damaging, in some case even more damaging, as physical abuse
As someone who has been involved in emotional abuse and has extremely close friends who have been involved in both forms of abuse, I can tell you, there is absolutely nothing beautiful it.
I'm so tired of reading all these stories romanticizing emotional abuse
(Not to mention that in 50
Shades he's also physically abusive????)
It's not beautiful and romantic for a girl to let a guy treat her like absolute trash because he wants her to "fix" him
It's not their job to fix them, it's the own abusers job to get off their disgusting ass and realize they are scum and maybe stop being such pieces of trash.
They don't need to be abusive to learn to not be abusive. It's like in these books, the victim has to prove to the abuser that they're good enough to not be abused
There's this one line I seem to see a lot in fanfics
"But he would never physically hurt me"
SO??? THE FACT THAT YOU HAVE TO SPECIFY THAT HE WOULDN'T HURT YOU PHYSICALLY, BECAUSE HE WOULD HURT YOU EMOTIONALLY, IS A HUGE RED LIGHT
I don't have a problem with bdsm at all ok. if you want to spank and tie up your partner in chains and gag them, you do you, but it HAS TO BE CONSENSUAL
IF ITS NOT
ITS FUCKING ASSAULT
IF YOU WANNA FIGHT ME ON THIS, FIGHT ME BC I DO MY RESEARCH AND I WILL WHOOP YO ASS
Just to give you a couple examples, I have some quotes so it doesn't seem like I'm just pulling this out of my butt
"No place to run. I would find you. I can track your cell phone-remember?"
???????!!!???!!?
WHY DO PEOPLE NOT FIND THIS TERRIFYING
WITHOUT BEING GIVEN CONTEXT, THIS SOUNDS LIKE SOMETHING A A PSYCHOTIC STALKER IN A HORROR MOVIE WOULD TEXT HIS NEXT VICTIM
and for those saying everything is consensual,
He bends and starts undoing one of my sneakers. Oh no... no... my feet. No. I've just been running. "No," I protest, trying to kick him off. He stops. "If you struggle, I'll tie your feet too. If you make a noise, Anastasia, I will gag you."
I'm sorry what did she say?
"No"?
That's all that he should need to stop. She said no, so whatever he does on her after she took away consent, is sexual assault
She was even trying to kick her way away from him, and he still forced himself on her
And in BDSM I realize a lot of times "no" Isn't valid and a safe word is used, I believe it was "red" for them, but this was not when Ana was agreeing to the BDSM
She had just gotten back from a run and was not in a situation where "no" is not a valid response
If you don't think these quotes prove this is a abusive relationship, then you're pretty fucked up in the head
And if I offended you by saying that, good
I don't care about offending people who support abuse
I could literally go on for probably five more pages about this but I am too overwhelmed RN to write anymore and it is literally 3:28 in the morning bc my anger is keeping me awake
-Mare
The next rant will probably be a funny one to balance out this one lmao bye
