A love reborn from the ashes.

8 - The truth about their love

Yusuf

I couldn't believe what that big man was saying in front of me, he might have looked strong and imposing, but in that moment his sad look, the regret and despair in his voice made him sound like a fragile and wounded being. He had exposed his heart and soul to a complete stranger, I thought he must be in dire need after a year of being away from everything and everyone.

A year, it was a year that he hadn't heard anything about what he had left behind, how other people's lives had gone on without him.

He had no idea how his departure had changed the fates of those left behind.

He finished by telling me how he had wandered with his boat alone around the world for those terrible twelve months and how, as soon as he arrived in Istanbul, mocking fate had led him to set his eyes on Sanem first thing.
He still couldn't believe it, it couldn't be a simple coincidence.

He stopped to look at me, nervously played with the rings on his fingers, lowered his gaze and without looking at me asked the question that had been obsessing him for a year and that must have been running through his head since he had seen her the day before.

- Is Sanem engaged? Or maybe married? How come she doesn't live with her parents in the neighborhood anymore? -

My old heart spasmed, how could I answer this question? It wasn't for me to talk, I tried to answer as best I could.

- No, she is neither engaged nor married.

Her head snapped up, her wide eyes looked at me for what seemed like an interminable time and then a wonderful smile spread across her beautiful face. I read hope and fear of hope, I read joy and regret, I read anguish for the future but also a faint trace of optimism. A vortex of feelings that that boy must have been hatching in himself for a whole year, he asked me again why he did not live with his parents, I shrugged my shoulders and at that point I had to stop, I told him clearly:

- This will be her to explain to you if and when she wants to talk to you -

His smile faded, I didn't want to discourage him but my heart, which loved young Sanem so deeply, could only think of protecting her, I looked at him with a hint of firmness and warned him.

- Bak oğlum, look son, the Sanem you left behind a year ago no longer exists, she is no longer the carefree and confident young woman you knew and loved.
She is still a lovely being but I can guarantee you that she went through the flames of hell after you left, I want to warn you, it won't be easy.
It won't be easy for you to get close to the woman she has become today, I don't want to discourage you, but I have to tell you clearly: if you think you can't fight for her to the end of your strength against everything and everyone, including her, then go back, take your beautiful boat and go back where you came from.
Don't you dare show your face to her eyes.

It's time to pull up the nets, I'll give you time to think well about what you want to do, you'll give me your answer when we are docked.-

I made to get up but her voice stopped me where I was.

- I don't need to think, if she hasn't moved on with her life in this year of being away, hasn't gotten engaged or married, then I can still hope.
All this time I have done nothing but repeat one word in my mind" Keşke, if only..." well now is the time to act, I can't leave and spend my whole life wondering what would have happened if I had stayed.

Ben onu çok seviyorum, I love her so much, I have always loved her and I don't know what terrible spell fell on me and made me leave her. I have been regretting it day after day for a whole year and if now destiny has wanted me to find her again, I can only fight until the end of my days to make it up to her.
To make up for the cowardice of not having turned back  soon as I realized I had left my heart behind -

Yusuf felt deep in his heart that the boy's words were sincere, he prayed to Allah that he would be able to come to terms with what was waiting for him on the ground in that small cottage and that, above all, he would be able to show that wonderful and stubborn young woman that he still loved her with a sincere love.
I nodded in agreement and acceptance and got up to go hoist the nets leaving him to his thoughts.

Can stood still for a moment, renewing his promise, mentally preparing himself to face whatever awaited him, then he shook himself to help that old man who was proving to be a trusted friend now for him as he had evidently been in the past also for Sanem.