lover | (chaesoo)

but home is just a room full of my safest sounds

Jisoo and I graduated high school a year after Irene and Seulgi's wedding.

That was almost 4 years ago, and Jisoo and I are college seniors now. Not much has happened in the last 4 years. Jisoo went on to become an English major, and I ended up taking Biology. We had classes in different faculties, had a different set of friends, and had different levels of workload.

Despite the difference, some things have remained the same: Jisoo is still the most beautiful girl in the entire school, and I am still the idiot helplessly in love with her.

It's strange. I thought that after high school, I would meet someone in college that would sweep me off my feet and make me fall in love, ultimately making me forget about my feelings for my best friend. Many have tried, many have come close, but no one has ever surpassed the emotions I had for Jisoo. I used to blame it on the fact that it's because I always see her, making moving on so difficult. But I've come to accept that even if Jisoo decided to go to another university to study, the kind of feelings I had for her would be able to go the distance.

Besides, if Jisoo really did decide to go to a different university, I didn't trust myself to not follow her.

-

"Do you really have to go, Rosie?", I heard Jisoo say from our living room couch.

I'm in the midst of packing for an exchange program to London. It's nothing I ever really planned, but when one of my professors said that we can do a semester in a university in London, I decided that maybe I needed a change of scenery.

Truth be told, I didn't think I would get it. There were at least a hundred people who signed up for the program, and only 20 people would get to go to London. I guess I was just fortunate enough to be part of that 20.

"I do, Jisoo," I said as I continued to fold up my clothes.

Jisoo just huffed before returning to her game, giving me the chance to steal longing glances at the girl I'm going to miss the most.

I sighed, however, because it is also because of this girl that I decided to go.

Just a few days before my professor talked about the exchange program in London was when I saw Jisoo hugging another girl I've never seen before. They were standing at the corner of the university plaza, just tightly hugging each other as if it were only them in that space.

The thing is, I know it broke my heart. But I remember staying there, completely statued, watching them hold each other. I only remember wanting to be that girl before I sighed and walked away.

When Jisoo got home that day, she was all smiles and so giddy, to the point that I feel that I could have told her that I threw all her gaming consoles out the window and she'd tell me that she would be so glad I did that. 

I remember sitting across Jisoo at the dinner table that night as she told me about her day, not mentioning anything about the plaza or the girl or the hug. I remember excusing myself right after that, walked to my room, and curled up in bed.

I don't remember when I fell asleep, or if I cried myself to sleep because of how heavy my heart felt. All I remember was waking up in the middle of the night to find a glass of water and medicine tablets siting on my bedside table with a note from Jisoo.

"Let me take care of you

x J"