The Loser

CHAPTER SIX

When I was finished with my luxurious bath. Yes, luxurious was the word of the day. A giant footed bathtub filled with hot water and bubbles was waiting for me when I undressed out of the tattered clothes. I was able to fully go under the water, that is how large this bathtub was. Also, it had a line of different scented soap dispensers that I could choose from. At home, we had the standard soap that never changed. Not that I was complaining. I remember that when I was younger before my sister married, we were lucky to share a bar between all of us. It was all my parents could afford.

Staring at my soap options was the very first time I began to understand how my life was about to change. After negotiations were finalized and Edward and I were permitted to move into the estate that his grandfather left, my life would transform dramatically. There would be maids and silk sheets. A closet of proper clothes and jewelry. I wasn't the kind of girl who would go gaga over something like clothes and jewelry. I would be better off without it because everything came with a price. As Edward said, I would be expected to study and act accordingly. For every fancy puzzle piece of my new life, I would have to give up a part of me to make it fit.

There is a heated large towel on the chair just outside the bathing quarters. I see that Edward has provided a robe and basic undergarments to wear until my dress is back. I am still horribly underdressed to walk about the house, but I need to speak to Alice. I send her a text hoping she will come down to my guest quarters.

I stand in the middle not wanting to ruin any furniture with my damp hair. I am already unfavorable with Esme and Carlisle. I didn't need to make my position any lower than it already was if that was possible.

I hear a shy knock on the door and I rush to open it.

Alice's warm smile makes me want to weep. She was the only person to ever be fully on my side. I knew she would never turn her back on me no matter how destitute my station became.

"Oh, Alice. Thank god. I need to talk to someone and I don't know what to do," I said pulling her into the room.

She gave me a small smile and went over to sit down on the fancy bed while I closed the door.

"I don't know what is going on with you and Edward. I stood up for you both, but I am not stupid. I know my brother. He talked you into this, didn't he?"

I came over and stood by the bed beside her while my hands made work wringing the satin material of my robe with my hands.

"Everything is happening so fast. He found me in the forest. I was drinking. I was so angry with my sister and he cooked up this plan. I didn't want to say yes. I tried to talk some sense into him. Make him see reason. The only thing that made it possible for me was that he said we could tell you. I would never lie to you. Now I don't know what to do. I am going to be married to a man. A Cullen! Stuck in a marriage where I am going to watch my husband sleep with whomever he wishes. Eventually, he will find a proper wife who he could love, and then, my role will be over. Doomed to walk the earth as a virgin for the rest of my life because no man will want me then."

"Wait, Edward said he would sleep with other people while you two were married?"

Forgetting myself, my body involuntarily finds a place next to Alice on the bed as I slowly sit down with a disconcerting look on my face.

"Bella, that would never happen. My brother may have changed since he was away, but he would never rub your nose in his ghastly affairs. Besides, even if I were to believe that this was true, why couldn't you find someone to sleep with on the side as well?"

I laughed and nearly fall back on the bed when I remembered my damp hair and stopped myself at the last second.

"And who would ever want to sleep with me?"