Stay (A TBZJL Fanfic)

EIGHTEEN

(Tobi POV)

Screwed. I was...screwed. Dead meat. The minute Freezy found out about that night would be my last minute alive, and I wanted to make it last.

So I didn't wake her up. I held her in my arms, watching her sleep like the creep I am. It was late, and I was getting tired, but I knew the minute I closed my eyes the moment would be over. So I willed myself to stay awake.

I leaned down and kissed her forehead, and in return she hummed in her sleep before tightening her hold around my waist. She looked so peaceful, and I didn't want to let her go.

I drew light circles on her arm with my fingertips before lacing my fingers through hers, taking a deep breath in and allowing my eyes to close as I did. I listened to her breathing, hugging her to my chest and counting the seconds I had left. My eyes wouldn't open again, so I knew it was close. Too close to being over.

"Why did Freezy have to get to you first?" I murmured softly. I knew she didn't hear me, but I said it anyway. I needed it off my chest. My jealousy, my sadness, my longing. I wanted her. Nothing else.

It was ironic that I couldn't have the one thing I wanted more than anything.

Watching her with Cal was...painful. He was a really good friend of mine, and nothing could change that, but the way he got to hold her in his arms without crushing guilt and regret was upsetting.

Freya and Josh had both noticed something was up with me. Freya was the first to approach me about it, scolding me for giving Casey that hibiscus flower on the day of the hike. She told me that I shouldn't be flirting with Cal's girlfriend, and I agreed.

I told myself it was just a friendly gesture, but I knew better than that. I'd seen the gift Cal had gotten her and tried to one-up him.

Then earlier that night, at the beach. It was the perfect time and place for a first kiss, and being the idiot I was, I decided to approach her. I honestly hadn't done it expecting to kiss her, but the fact that we had gotten close sealed my fate.

She stirred in her sleep and buried her face in the crook of my neck, making me shudder as her warm breath glided across my skin.

I was a hopeless romantic. I didn't necessarily crave sex from girls like JJ or Ethan did (though, it's always a nice bonus). I preferred the small, sweet things to that. So when she'd barged into my room with the complete opposite mindset, I panicked. That wasn't how I wanted it to go, especially after our first kiss was stolen from us in a heated mess of a moment.

Though I was disappointed that our first kiss was through lust instead of out of love, I was glad we didn't take it any further. It was one thing to kiss my friend's girlfriend, but it would have been another if we did more than that.

"Tobi?" She spoke against my skin and I let out a breath.

"Yeah?"

She tiredly brought her hand up and rested it on my cheek, turning my head to the side so I was facing her. I let my eyes slowly flutter open so I could stare into her deep blue ones.

She planted a soft kiss on my lips, moving her lips in sync with mine before pulling away for air. "I want to tell you something."

I reached my own hand up to brush her curls away from her eyes. "What is it, Casey?"

She bit her lip. "It's...Cassie. As in, Cassiopeia."

I twirled a strand of her hair around my finger, taking in what she'd just said to me. "So...that's what your tattoo means."

She nodded. "It's my real name. My dad gave it to me, then left after I got this tattoo. I loved him so much I got this tattoo when I was 16. But...after he left...I hated my name. I started having people call me Casey. Ethan gave up calling me Cassie after a few months."

My eyes trailed down to the tattoo on her shoulder, which was showing since the strap of her dress had fallen down. I leaned down and pressed my lips on her skin, right on the tattoo, before tilting my head up and pecking the tip of her nose.

"I think it's beautiful."

Even though it was dark, I could tell she was blushing. She always did whenever I called her that.

"What do I do?" She squeaked. "About Cal?"

I squeezed my eyes shut at that, cringing. "We'll worry about it tomorrow, okay?"

She sighed, resting her head on my chest and nodding. I decided that since she shared something, I should, too.

"My real name's Tobit," I stated. "Tobit John Brown. It's Hebrew."

"What does it mean?" She questioned.

"It means 'God is good,'" I chuckled. "My mum named all of us based on scripture...it's just how I was raised."

"It's cute," She hummed. I could tell she was getting tired, so I didn't say anything after that. I held onto her tightly and let the rhythm of her breathing lull me to sleep.

Okay, for those of you who have read my Sidemen 7 Minutes in Heaven, you know that I'm not creative at all when it comes to names haha. But for my next few fanfics (after Bookworm and Stay), the names of the main character will be different I swear.