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the morning dew and white covered scenery of snezhnaya was nothing but plain to you.
you sat down, painting the same old view you saw everyday. it was bleek, not even a drop of color touched the snow.
you moved your paintbrushes swiftly, painting an image that you've done a million times.
how many days has it been since he left?
childe left for some business in liyue, your homeland. you were brought to snezhnaya for an arranged marriage but fell in love with the harbinger instead.
but as years passed, the winter soon took a toll on your warm heart.
without the love of your significant other and the empty feeling snezhnaya brought you, your soul was nothing but incomplete.
you were numb, your core was frozen like the everlasting winter of snezhnaya.
one strokes, two strokes, turned into hundreds more.
how many weeks has it been since he left?
you still remembered it vividly, the day you met.
you were fresh out of liyue, excited to see what came up ahead. you weren't use to the cold weather but nonetheless kept your head high.
you've already met your fiancé prior to visiting snezhnaya. they were alright, you knew you coukd learn to love them.
as you continued to walk to icy streets, a little boy bunped into you. the boy fell on his bum, groaning in pain. you knelt down to their level and asked them if they were okay.
"where are your parents? do you need any help?" you asked, holding the boy's hand.
"i-i just want my big brother." he pouted.
"alright, what does your brother look like? i'll help you find them!"
"teucer, there you are!" another voice called, seeming to call for the little boy you were talking to.
"brother!" teucer exclaimed.
you watched as he ran up to childe. teucer wrapped his arms around him while childe held him protectively.
"don't ever run off like that again young man! good thing i found you." he scolded.
the two brother's looked towards you.
"this nice person offered to help me find you. even though you found me, i should probably say thank them." teucer stated, earning a nod from childe.
"thank you nice person!"
"you're welcome. you can call me y/n."
another stroke, this time you decided to add color. another stroke. each line you painted was harsher, less graceful.
how many months has it been since he left?
time became blurry to you ever since childe left. you've lost count of how long you've waited.
you remember how childe would take care of you when you were sick. he was an absolute professional, a perfect father if you were to have children.
childe would make hot soup, and be nicer than usual. you could still hear the care in his voice whenever he asked, "do you want me to feed you?" or "is there anything you need?"
despite you being sick, he'd get in bed with you and whisper sweet nothings to lull you to sleep.
often, you'd forget he was a harbinger everytime he'd care for you. he would do anything for the people he loved, so you knew he wasn't a bad guy.
but despite everything, he still broke his promise.
how many years has it been since he left?
you could never forgive him. why would he make a promise he couldn't keep? he was the most honest person you knew, the only one you could trust.
why would he break his promise?
"you're going to liyue? why can't i come with you?" you asked, sitting on the bed you shared. childe was packing his stuff, getting ready to depart.
"it's official fatui business, which means it could be dangerous. besides, it only a few weeks, y/n." childe said.
"we all know that's a lie. these harbinger duties of yours always take longer than expected." you stated, tugging on his top.
"the tsaritsa needs me on this. besides, i'm gonna be just fine."
"but what about me? i'll be lonely here!"
"i'll come back as soon as i can. and then i'll settle everything and marry you, i promise."
liar.
"hmm.. alright fine! just make sure to say hello to my parents. ooh, and don't forget to write!"
"of course, anything for you darling."
childe gave you a kiss on the forehead before walking out the door. "i'll miss you. see you soon."
why did you leave me?
amother stroke, another color added to the painting. your tears were running down as you smudged the red on the canvas. tiny sobs came out of your mouth while your heart fell to the pit of your stomach.
——————————— ★༄
how long has it been since he passed?
"he's gone, y/n. dead." signora stated.
you stood in your place, shocked. he was the strongest person you knew, he couldn't have been dead.
"i don't know why i have to inform you, but nonetheless i give you my condolences."
"h-how.. how did it happen?" you asked, your throat drying out from a simple sentence.
"from what i heard, he bit off more than he could chew. used his foul legacy transformation when he was still too injured to endure. his body couldn't handle it."
"oh."
——————————— ★༄
you finished your painting.
a picture of what could've been.
you and childe smiling at the altar, hands intertwined. you could have been happy, could have been together until the end. he could have fulfilled his promises, just like he always did.
but he was gone.
the painting of you and childe together was demolished with scarlet red.
your biggest fear became a reality. a nightmare turned into a real battle.
if only he didn't leave that day, maybe your heart wouldn't be as cold as ice.
(idk what this is. THIS IS CRINGE JAJAJAJAJ) edit: ur guys' comments are so sweet 😭 thank you so much for your kind words :[[
