GUARD | Billie Eilish

would i do it again?

Lips. The feelings of the pressed against your own can be overwhelming. The soft, tender touches you both make. Having the feeling that no one else around you matters, the feeling that they don't even exist. Only this time, Robyn's eyes were glued to me, I knew from the second Jake's lips touched mine that her eyes darted to me.

"Billie what the fuck" Robyn gritted her teeth pushing Jake off of me

You see after the kiss, the magical kiss, it wasn't awkward. We carried on talking and watched a film before Cleo finally woke up to play and then Robyn dropped me home. But when I woke up the next morning...

Should we go back to earlier today? I think we should.

"so what happened?" Finneas asked

"i um we kissed" i blushed remembering how it felt

"and you say i don't know shit" he laughed

"okay okay.. shit" i gasped as Robyn's name popped onto my screen

Robyn

I'm outside, need to speak.

Oh fuck this can't be good. I looked up to Finneas as he looked over to my phone screen.

"Billie.. i think you should go"

"But what if-"

"then we will deal with that if" he reassured me

Paranoia set in as I walked down my stairs. Hands sweaty, legs shaking, the fuck did she need to talk about so urgently? Who am I kidding... it's obviously about the kiss. Fuck what have I got myself into.

"hi" i tried to force a smile at Robyn

"hey.. so i'm just gona get this all out right now, the kiss was a mistake-"

There is was, that one sentence everyone dreads to hear. The fuck am I supposed to do? Just go oh it's okay I know right haha especially after that massive speech you gave about wanting to always fucking kiss me Robyn.

"-it's unprofessional and if i'm being honest i'm not ready for a relationship or anything really and i don't want you to get the wrong picture, i know what i said must've got into your head, and believe me i would be feeling kinda weird too, but i'm toxic and i play people, like i already told you so i thinks it's just best that we forget what happened and i can carry on doing my job with protecting you"

"yeah whatever" i sighed shutting the door for her. I can't be asked for that bullshit

"the fuck you doing Jake?" Robyn yelled at him

"she kissed me" he tried to explain "what? you jealous she kissed me before you" he smirked

"oh fuck you, stop being a cunt" she hit him "i thought better of you" she looked towards me

"you were the one wanting to forget about our kiss tho right?"

"unbelievable" she huffed and walked out

"i'm sorry what the fuck?" Jake questioned