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Chapter 31

I woke up wearing bills shirt, forgetting i put it on. I missed food again having dismissed Jill last night when she came up to wake me, I wondered if she'd seen it.

"Clarice, are you up?" It was joe knocking on the door I yelled him come in, hiding myself under the covers, trying to make sure he wouldn't see the shirt. "How was it?"

"Yeah it was great, really nice hotel. I met George bush, really good guy. Not much happened really, I got a dress but it's a surprise."

"A surprise? Alright suit your self." He smiled. Silence settled over us, as we both thought about what to say. I had so much to say, but bill told me to stay quiet on whatever I knew.

"Is that my shirt?"

I could've lied, but I didn't want to flare anything back up again with him for Jill. "No"

"Yes it is" he took my arm and pulled me up out of bed. I stood there in nothing but my lingerie, wrapping the shirt around myself. He came up to me and smelt it's collar soon backing up.

"Right" his eyebrows pinched downwards together as he looked down at his shoes before setting off again.

"Joe?" He turned back not bothering to look at me. "We're friends remember?"

"Yeahh" he smiled down at his feet once last time, and left.

The man looked so saddened and defeated, I felt terrible, but we pushed each other away, and I was moving on. He had a wife, and I had bill... who also had a wife. I didn't feel bad about Hillary, because I still thought she was a bitch anyway so I cared less about her than I did for Jill.

I started getting ready for the day preparing to go find Joe again, and In the space of five minutes I was done.

I turned up outside his office next to my room opening the door to see him stood there looking out the window to the back garden. "Joe you cannot be mad at me" I said shutting the door.

"I'm not mad"

"Then what are you, because you look like someone's lit a fire under your arse"

"Language." For the first time he looked at me again, warning me. I could only roll my eyes at his comment as my vocabulary never mattered before. "I'm not mad. I'm just disappointed."

"You mean jealous" I mumbled under my breath, I didn't plan to say it, it just happened, but With my luck joe unfortunately caught it.

"I'm not jealous. You shouldn't be hanging around with bill full stop, I don't see why you won't listen to me" Because he didn't own me, and it didn't help him being so secretive.

"I like bill, He's a good influence."

"Yeah I'm sure he's influenced you" he was right about that. "I have half a mind to tell him not to come"

"Why because he makes me happy?"

"Did I make you happy?" His whole tone demeanour changed in an instant.

"Yes." More than bill when we were good. He only huffed in response. "Joe I have some of my best memories with you. And you may not believe it, but I did love you, and still do, but I'm moving on. It's for the best, you have to let me go"

"You didn't love me. Not like that."

"Believe what you want but I'm not lying. Ive missed you despite all the fucking tears. I'm all cut up, my heart is battered and bruised and I'm just healing again. Let me heal, please." It came out sounding like a cry for help, He just stood there just watching me behind his desk sighing deeply hanging his head. I wanted to know what was going on in that mind. "Ok" he sped over taking me in his arms, we clung together.

"I'll let you go" I squeezed him tighter like he was about to leave for good burying my head in his chest.

Despite all my plotting and scheming and thinking about having joe at my feet, I couldn't bring myself to lead him on like that when it came down to it. He was my Sunday. The reason I began to Truly smile again after the night of Janet. He was the feeling of home even with all the fights. Even when bill wanted to fuck me, I still thought of joe. And now I was Pushing him away further.

"Just please listen when I say bill Clinton is not a good man"

"Thank you joe" he kissed the top of my head with his soft lips and we parted ways. I started hating myself for leaving that room the way I did so easily, but I was the one who wanted him to let go in the first place.

"Rhys, joe!" Jill called me from downstairs, I waited at the top of the stairs as I heard the front door open. Joe went down the steps and i saw him outstretch him arms.

"Hunter!"