Keys to the Kingdom

Deal with the devil in the dark

I thank you for your patience.
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My heart pounded as dread and guilt curled within my entrails, slithering like a carnivorous snake, threatening to eat me alive from the inside out. Illumi's aura softened, the sharpness of his being gave way to an unfurling flower of love. My eyes watered and the words stuck in my throat as he grabbed my hands, holding them with so much care- because I am  his flower he felt the undeniable urge to always protect. He only touched me with such gentleness. His eyes- black abysses, usually so devoid of emotion, seemed to flicker with tendrils of joy, his thin lips curled into an almost natural, loving, and n-normal smile. His eyes brightened and I realized I no longer was looking into black holes that absorb light- but rather a night sky missing its stars. I could be his stars. "I can be your stars, Illumi" I whispered aloud, like an undeniable promise- as if that would replace me telling him I'd marry him. As if telling him some cheesy rom com shit would erase the urge to shout, "NO! I LOVE YOU BUT IM DONE TRYING TO MARRY PEOPLE!"

He smiled softly and nodded, as if waiting for more. I shook my head, realizing he couldn't actually read minds. Part of me wished he could part of me wished he'd just understand what I'm thinking right at this moment. I bit my lip, not knowing how to voice my feelings, when he was so elated. I want Hisoka and Elaine at my wedding and I haven't even seen or talked to either of them. I need time to work through my own feelings, and eventually, revisit them. It's just too soon, I'm not sure. Again, i opened my mouth to try to tell him something, anything.

He squeezed my hands and said softly, "I would love to marry you. I absolutely admire and adore you. It does not have to be immediate, and I have a smattering of gifts and schemes, as you would say, regarding this, because I've been planning, and it is going to be so uplifting to share our ideas..." It was an admission of feeling, but also a prompt. For me. To talk. About marriage. He's never been this rash.

I blushed, and looked down holding, powerful and precise hands in mine. How soft was his skin, in juxtaposition with the strength his hands possessed. He could snap my wrists in half at any moment, but he chooses not to. He chooses not to because he loves me, among other reasons I'm sure. "Please God..." i whispered aloud, now staring at the ceiling, hoping with every fiber of my being that a desperate prayer from someone who typically never prayed before, would be answered.

I held my breath, the seconds passing like hours, procrastinating giving my Illumi a real answer. "Flower...?" Illumi began and i flinched, coming to grips with the realization that God had probably forsaken me.

I had to act yet I was frozen, fused to the floor.

Forsaken.

Or maybe not.

With near silent arrival, I felt a white hot wave of intrusive power wash over me. My eyes widened, as Illumi tensed, and stepped in front of me, facing the tall, decorated walls. Then, the large portrait was flung open, to reveal a handsome, older man, perhaps early sixties. He was physically built muscular and tall, yet he walked with graceful, mindful steps. His eyes were a piercing green, vibrant and lush like a forest. His teeth were stained red, like Juana's, and his his goatee was a sea of brown, peppered with gray. His skin was brown and his suit a blinding white with stripes of writhing, hissing color. He was so powerful, radiant and overbearing he may even rival the sun.

He nears us, his crow's feet crinkling amiably, yet his smile secretive . I stepped out from behind an alert and angry  Illumi, yet still staying right beside him. "My dears, I must have interrupted something quite important. That's absolutely no good, is it?" He winked at me, and i shivered with goosebumps rippling across my skin. Did he know? Did he somehow hear my prayers? Relief flooded my viens and my the tension in my shoulders released. Still though, I was wary. Yet, This guy- whoever he was- came through for me. I silently thanked God, who, up until now- I hadn't heard from. Illumi was too preoccupied with this man to realize my immense relief at his interrupted confession. Illumi protectively wrapped his arm around my waist, and hugged me so hard it almost hurt. I pat his chest gently, a silent reminder that he doesn't need to hold onto me quite so tightly. That didn't change his grip, though, not today.