Chapter 32 || This Isn't You Talking

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Your POV

By the time we got back to the compound it was 2 in the morning. After dinner, Wanda and I walked around, she was so excited to be in NYC that she skipped around like a little kid. She looked so happy and free, so goddamn adorable, that I had to take pictures of course.

I swipe through all the pictures and videos from tonight, making sure to have her beautiful smile engraved into my mind before I fall asleep so that I can dream of her.

I do.

It's weird, sometimes you can persuade your mind to dream about things...until you lose control. And then the nightmares start.

"Y/N, please. You're hurting me." My hands are around her through, my powers restraining every limb of hers as I squeeze her only access to oxygen.

I notice her eyes go scarlet, trying to enter my mind but I block her out, grunting as I punch her, causing her to fall to the ground in pain.

She glances up, fear evident in her eyes but I don't sway, I use my powers to lift her and throw her into a wall. I feel an electricity course through me, then see Zemo staring at me with a wide grin.

Something is off about him.

I'm already complying, why is he hurting me?

"More," he says and I feel the pain again.

"Y/N!" Soft hands on my shoulders shake me.

I shoot up in bed, instantly using my powers to throw anyone near me away. Wanda is shoved back slightly but she overpowers me, a forcefield forming around her. Guess she's gotten used to this routine, huh?

"It was just a dream, you're alright." She approaches me slowly, afraid I'll try something again, but I just let her crawl into my bed and hold me.

Flashes of the experiments stain my brain, every time I blink or close my eyes I can see that chair, feel that pain, all of it. I can see the life escaping Wanda's face the longer I grip her neck.

"NO!" I shriek and flail my body, super speeding to the wall. I expect her to follow but she doesn't, she just sits on my bed, watching me.

I feel a sudden anger come over me, ripping apart my insides as I grunt out, "You're going to do nothing? Just like when your brother died? Just sitting there while I'm in pain? The person you claim to care for the most? Pathetic."

Her face goes stale, jaw set tightly into place, eyes rigid and turned to an empty gray. I notice tears building up but she refuses to meet my eyes.

"This isn't really you talking."

"Is it not?"

I make my way over, my fingers gently placing themselves under her chin before I lift her head to look me in the eyes.

"You sure about that, Red Eyes?"

Her mouth opens a bit, eyes softening at my touch but when she gets a good look into my eyes, she grunts and suddenly I'm against the wall under the restraint of her powers locking both of my arms and legs into place.

"Give me my Y/N back or so help me God I will-" "You'll what? Kill me? Hate to break it to you sweetheart but if you kill me you kill her."

Her hand slaps across my cheek, nearly knocking me out of my anger spell. I blink a few times and whine, "Ouch Wands, that hurt!"

When I look at her I can see the hurt in her eyes, the pure pain from my psychotic alter ego's words painted all over her face. But she's trying to mask it with an intimidating stare.

"Which Y/N am I talking to now," she states, her voice monotone, like she's afraid to show me a weaker side. But I can feel the worry radiating off of her. Still, she doesn't look scared of me.

That's one thing I like most about Wanda. No matter how intense things get, no matter how out of control I get or threatening or angry, she never runs away. Instead, she runs towards me. Holds me, and doesn't even flinch. She trusts me, knows that I won't hurt her...Well, not me me. I realize that she is still waiting for my response so I nod gently.

"Why don't you see for yourself?"

Taking the hint, she focuses on me while her eyes turn their beautiful red. I watch her as she steps closer, eyes going back to normal and suddenly I'm released from the magical restraints. I walk towards her faster and press my lips against hers.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Fuck. Fuck I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to. That wasn't me talking I swear it I don't-I don't know what came over me, I don't know. Wanda I'm so...Fuck."

"Hey, hey! Baby it's okay. It's okay!" Her voice is almost hushed, soothing, her soft hands caressing my face, forcing me to focus on her eyes.

"Now, you wanna tell me where that came from?"

Shaking my head I shrug, "I-I don't know. It just...the nightmare. All I can remember was hurting you, and then the...the chair and the pain, the electricity. But the thing was that the pain wasn't the worst of it all. The worst part was hurting you. And then you pulled me out...but then the nightmare c-came true. I felt the anger building, I felt that version of me in the nightmares appearing. And hurting you-god I can't even...Fuck."

I start to back away and grab my head but Wanda grips my hands and pulls me into her body, arms swiftly encasing me in her incredible scent. My veins shoot up with comfort, feeling as though she's wrapping me with her red powers in this safety net of love. Every single inch of my skin lights up with this comfort and I let my body fall into it. I let that wall tumble down a bit more.

"It wasn't you, it's okay. I think some of Hydra is still in there. We should talk to Bruce tomorrow" "No, no more experiments on me, no more needles, no more tests. Please, Wanda. I can't handle it anymore. I just want to be here, be me. I can control it, you can help me. Please."

I pull away from her arms and stare at her to show my desperation. I can't do anymore of this science-y shit. I just want things to be normal, I want to be with Wanda, train, save the world, blah blah blah, but most of all I want to stay as far away from being experimented on again. If I go to Bruce he'll hook me up to shit and test things until he finds out what's going on and I know for a fact that I'll lose it if I do that.

She seems to balance her options while reading me to assure herself that this is genuinely a good idea, to hide this from everyone. But when she reads my fear, her shoulders drop and her breath releases, a small smile forming on her lips as she leans up to place a short but sweet and meaningful kiss on my lips.

"It'll be our secret for now. But controlling this, it won't be easy, Stark."

"I don't need easy, I just need possible."

Her face lights up while her hands lift to cup my cheeks,

"With you? Anything is possible."

___

A/N:  Don't we love it when Wanda helps us with our nightmares? Because I do.

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