Lover's Curse (Red Queen Awards Winner)

Chapter Thirty Five - Off Key

Iris

Mother's words wear marks into the floorboards, chasing me as I pace about my room. I don't know why you're so insistent on it.

I'm an idiot.

How did I ever think this would work? Of course Mare would hate being forced into manacles again. Of course my justifications would seem flimsy and farcical. Of course Mother would dismiss me as overeager and desperate.

I grab the nearest pillow and scream.

My eyes quiver. Useless. Tears are useless, useless wastes of water and yet they come, ugly, uneven, and endless. She's going to die. And it's going to be my fault.

You're allowed to make mistakes.

Not if others bear the consequences.

If anyone is going to pay for a decision I made, it'll be me. If Mother never trusts me again, so be it. If I must re-marry Maven to maintain the alliance, so be it. If I must stand tall as Tiora screams at me for destroying our one chance to remain united, so be it.

A terrible idea got me into this mess. A terrible idea can get me out.

"Mother."

She's seated in her study, an airy, circular room with windows and greenery to spare. I'm not supposed to disturb her unless it's urgent. "I'm busy, dear."

"I'm sorry."

That catches her attention. "What for?"

"I've been foolish." Head bowed, I slide into a chair beside her. "It wasn't right to demand your energy be spent on my responsibilities, especially those which bore no value. Please forgive me."

"Iris." She takes my hand. "It's alright. There's no need to apologize."

"But I--"

"No buts." Mother shushes me. "Go help your sister. I gave her some documents to file this morning, and I suspect she's stuck. It'll make her day."

I hesitate.

"Is something wrong?"

"Never mind." I turn away. "It's nothing."

"It's not nothing if it's bothering you." Mother cocks her head. "You can tell me anything, Iris. I won't judge you."

A beat passes.

Anything.

"There's a piece of lint stuck in your gown." I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. "See? Nothing."

She frowns. "Really? I don't--"

"Allow me." The fabric pinches easily between my fingers, and they dust off within a few blurry seconds. "There. Gone."

"Ah." She laughs. "Thank you."

My closet hook holds one key as easily as another, especially when the orginal is tucked within a drawer. I'm the only one who uses Father's music box. The only one who, when the time is right, could slip it from the hook and into Mare's hand without incident. All I need is to get her alone.

Which means getting rid of Tiora.

"Sorry." She grimaces. Four hours, and nothing to show for it. "I didn't mean to--"

"Sorry doesn't make it go faster." I slam another envelope on the desk, jaw clenched. It's always me picking up the slack, always jolting her to attention, always reminding her of tasks I'd asked her to do less than an hour ago. I. Don't. Have. Time. For. This.