chapter 11

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After you had discussed with your team and came to a solution with the problem with your old back, you headed back to your room. You weren't on the mood of hanging out with them. You also were too uncomfortable when you had to talk about your old pack even a little. Gladly they had learn to not ask much of questions.

You were opening your door as you heard someone coming towards you. You prepared to an attack, but noticed soon quickly enough that it was just Loki.
Your fist were already in punching position as you turned around, and it made Loki stop fast.
"Are you going to punch me with that?" he teased and pointed at your raised arm.
You blushed and put your hand down.
"Sorry.." you mumbled and rubbed your neck. Even after a year of living in the tower, you were still too cautious and always were prepared for the worst.
"It's alright little wolf, I understand." Loki said gently and smiled warmly afterwards. You lifted your head and looked at him with confused expression showing on your face.

How could he possibly understand your situation?

"Did you want something or..?" you decided to change the subject. Loki probably hadn't got you scared just for fun.
"I just wanted to ask if you were alright?" Loki said with gently and caring tone in his voice. You put on your lips a smile and nodded in response. "I'm alright."

"Glad to hear that, Y/N." Loki replied and rubbed his neck. He clearly had been worried about you, but were not going to admit it.

*

You woke up from your couch. Seems like you had moved in half asleep to there from your bed. You still slept there better though.
You checked the time and sighed heavily as you noticed that it was just a midnight and you had been only sleeping like an hour. You didn't feel tired at all and it was frustrating.

But now you didn't feel like sleeping at all so instead of rolling around on your couch, you decided to go to the one of your favorite places in the tower.

"You didn't get sleep?" you heard a familiar voice behind you while you were picking a book from the bookshelf. A smell of frost and mint told you, that it was Loki.
You grabbed a book and turned around.
"You really shouldn't sneak behind me like that or I'll punch you next time and claim it was just an accident." you teased him with nervous laugh following behind. Loki laughed too and grinned.
"Looks like the wolf can tease too after all." Loki teased you and it made you look down at your toes. You tried hard to ignore the feeling of unprotection and fear. Although it had got little better now when you had spent more time with him, but it was still little hard to manage your feelings.

You walked to the couch with him and saw instantly a cup of tea and a book laying on the table. Loki had been here already before you.
"Seems like you hadn't got any sleep either." you mumbled as you sat down. Loki shook his head and grabbed his book.
"I enjoy the nights with a good book." he replied, waiting for you to judge him for that. But you didn't, you understood him.

Loki lifted his book up and started reading, and so would you had if your eyes hadn't attached to the cover of his book. You couldn't help smiling and you grinned a little to his 'good book'.

"What?" Loki asked curiously as he noticed your smirking. You pointed at his book and Loki blushed a little.
"If I remember right, you said those books weren't your type." you teased him.
"Well, I'm afraid that you might have been right. And I have to admit that I got little curious about this book and I decided  just to take a look at it, but seems like it didn't stay on that way." Loki laughed nervously and looked at the cover of the first Harry Potter book.

"You know, there's a movie of each book too." you said and pointed at your Harry Potter which was the third of them.
"Really?" Loki asked, stunned. You just were surprised that he even knew what a movie was.
"Yeah, I just never had watched them. I've heard they're not as good as the books." you explained. You started to reach your confidence even more and more while you talked with him.
"Well, maybe we can watch them together after I had finished these all?" Loki suggested and smiled gently. You answered to that smile and nodded as an accept.
Then neither of you clearly didn't have anything else to say so you both got back into your books.

While you were reading your book, you couldn't ignore the fact that Loki was glancing at you once in a while. He had that same thoughtful look on his face and it really did bother you, so you decided to gather up your courage and ask him about it.

"I can see you're thinking about something, what is it?" you asked firmly, putting your book down on your lap at the same time. Loki smirked and did the same.
"Is it that obvious?" he laughed and it earned a little laugh from you too. You nodded in response which made Loki sigh heavily.
"Well, I was wondering about those earlier events with that male-wolf from your pack." Loki started. You tilted your head like always when you were in your wolf form. It was kind of a reflex. You were wondering what he was up to this time.

"I couldn't stop thinking about his words." he mumbled.

Now you were more curious what he had in mind.

"He called you Lilith." Loki said finally and turned to look at you. Your head dropped down and you looked at your hands. That name had always disgusted you. Loki noticed your reaction and he slowly inched little closer to you.
"What is it?" he asked gently, he hadn't meant to offend you. You lifted your head up again, trying to control the anger and sadness what that name had brought you.
"Lilith is my name among the pack." you replied firmly, trying to fought all those bad memories of them. Loki looked curious first, but then the expression on his face turned into concern as he realized you were hurt by that name.
"I can see it bothers you. Does it mean something?" he asked carefully, trying really hard to be gentle with you.
You hesitated for a while, you weren't sure should you tell him or not.
"Hey little wolf, it's okay." he said, softening his voice.

You clenched your fists while you took a deep breath.

"In my old pack, Lilith means 'the night monster'." you explained firmly, but the anxiety showed deep in your voice as you spoke. You still considered, should you tell him this or not, but your wolf made you keep going. Something in her liked that god of mischief.
"Werewolves in here have a legend." you started as you looked up into his eyes.
"When a wolf is born with jet-black fur, like mine, they call it the night monster or demon wolf."

"Why?" Loki asked gently, he had come very close to you, without you noticing it.

"Because none of the werewolves are born naturally with black fur. It's rare, it doesn't just happen. And it's written that if one is born in the pack, it will bring power, but also destruction to them." you explained firmly, you were really nervous about Loki's coming reaction. You hadn't been sure about telling him this and now when you had done it, you were so unsure what he will think of you after this. No one in this team knew about your name in the pack and its meaning to them.

"If that demon wolf  brings destruction, why they want you back then?" Loki asked curiously, and not even horrified of your story.
"Because they're scared. I think that the alpha thinks that I will become that wolf and destroy him if I'm not on his side." you sighed nervously. "And also he just wants those demon wolf's powers.."

Loki didn't even bat an eye after you had explained him that (in your opinion) terrible story of you. He just started to smile gently.
Your had expected him to be scared, or disgusted or that he wouldn't want to hang out with you anymore. But no, this silly god of mischief just smiled at you and looked even more curious.

"You're not... scared or something?" you asked carefully, trying to get inside his mind.
"No little wolf, why would I be?" Loki replied innocently. He seemed like he had no idea why he should be scared of you.
"Because everyone else are." you mumbled and looked down at your lap again.
"Does someone of the avengers know about your name and the story behind it?" Loki decided to ask, making you to look at him again. You shook your head in response.
"No one, except you." you said firmly. "And I'd like to keep it that way."

Loki nodded, accepting your request.
"Your secret is safe with me, Lilith." he promised you.

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