bts oneshots

happy birthday to me × j.jk x bts

tw: self harm, suicide attempt

jungkook blew out the wax candles that had the numbers '2' and '3' on them, his hyungs cheered the boy on as he did so.

but jungkook couldn't help but feel guilt and frustration as he stared at the cake. he was supposed to be dead, he remembered the promise he made to himself when he was 20.

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he looked at the puddle of blood next to his arm as he cried, he didn't want to be alive anymore. he deserved the burning sensation on his arms and thighs.

"j-jeon j-jungkook..you b-better b-be dead b-by the time y-you're 23" he mumbled to himself.

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he shivered at the flashback and stared back at his hyung's, "are you going to cut the cake?" namjoon asked with a big smile, jungkook faked a small smile and nodded, picking up the knife on the table.

he put the knife into the cake, slowly cutting it and putting a piece on to a plastic plate, doing that 7 times.

he felt horrible, he promised himself to be dead but he wasn't. he shouldn't be here, he wanted to cry but faked a smile for the members.

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jungkook went to his room and isolated himself after cutting the cake and talking with the members for a bit. he hated feeling like this.

he sobbed into his pillow, not realizing how loud he was being until there was a knock at his door.

"jungkook-ah, open up" a voice said, jungkook didn't bother to stand up and open the door, let alone answer his hyung, "open or i'll crack the door open" the voice said, jungkook cried harder, "l-leave me alone!" he sobbed, rolling up into a small ball.

the other person left to jungkook's relief, but jungkook was still upset. he didn't want to be alive.

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he grabbed a blade, digging it in to his skin until his whole body was weak. this was it, jeon jungkook was going to be gone.

his vision went blurry and he soon passed out, finally, he was gone. or was he?

"jungkook-ah!" seokjin banged on the door, worried that jungkook wasn't answering, "jungkook!" he shouted, bit jungkook was unresponsive. the boy made no hesitation to put all his body force against the door to slam it open.

he was terrified at the scene, there was a puddle of blood next to jungkook and a note that said, 'i'm so sorry hyungies' in messy handwriting next to him.

his hands began shaking, his mind went blank. he didn't know what to do.

he called the emergency number and got ready to leave to the hospital with jungkook. tears were running down his cheeks and he held jungkook's hand, he felt horrible.

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seokjin didn't tell anyone, he waited at the hospital while the members were at schedule. he didn't want jungkook to freak out when he woke up. he felt responsible for all of this. he should've saw all the red flags.

like when jungkook started loosing motivation, how quiet he got, how he refused to go out on their days off. he hated this.

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