The way I feel for you

- Chapter 4 -

Lottie's P.O.V

 What was I thinking? Asking her if she liked Jamie? Now I've made things worse. I hate how I splutter my words out before even thinking about it. I'm a horrible, horrible human being. 

As I walked through the never-ending hallway, I heard a muffled voice come from a room. It sounded like the person was crying, I made out the words in my head.

"Stupid, ugly, worthless."

I gasped, who would say that to themselves? I put my ear on the door the voice was coming from, it was a girl's cries. She sounded pained and hurt, wait I recognised that voice. Maya?

"You were stupid to leave this place, so damn stupid to leave Jamie. You wear your ring to remind yourself that he's still here. HE'S NOT!"

She was talking about Jamie, that's why she didn't want to talk about the ring, it was a gift from him. That's it, I'm knocking. I put my fist on the door and pressed it against the white wood. Slowly, the door opened, revealing a tearful Maya behind it, she sniffled.

"Hey Maya.....I think we need to talk,"

I could tell she hesitated for a minute before nodding and allowing me inside. I sat on a couch close to the door, Maya's icy blue eyes were filled with tears. "What's going on?" I tried giving a stern voice but it didn't work, my voice just cracked. Maya was leaning against one of the pillars of her canopy bed, crossing her arms; she reminded me so much of Jamie. 

"I'm just-I..I don't know,"

She shoved her face into her pale skin. I've never seen this side of her, I've only known her for a day, I can't assume. She puts on such a strong character, ruthless, cunning she was like a combination of Jamie and Ellie. The more I thought about it, the more I could tell why Jamie liked her. 

I exhaled quietly "Maybe start off with why you left them?"

She paused, was this really the best idea? Gently, she reached for her silver ring and once again fidgeted with it, she reminded me of myself when I have my tiara. Maya allowed herself to become lost in thought while staring at the piece of jewellery. "I left because," she started, sniffling "it was too much for me, I was overwhelmed,"

"Confessing to the boy you like and having him like you back is overwhelming?"

Maya shook her head, tears still in her eyes "It's not that, I just knew I would break him someday and I didn't want that to happen, and I was right,"

Wow, I never thought she would be so open to me. Here I was, talking to Edmund's sister and she's crying her eyes out in front when I've only known her for a day. I knew Jamie's loneliness had to come somewhere from his childhood, I just never expected it to be from her. I thought it was about how he never had a real  family, being raised as a Partizan seems cold. 

I looked to the ground "It's alright, he's been more...soft to me and Ellie recently. Whatever you did, I'm sure it's solved." 

She whimpered and touched the bridge of her nose, why didn't she find that comforting? I honestly don't understand her at all, then again, I don't even know her that well at all. "That's great," she sighed at last, wiping the tears away from her cheeks "you fixed him,"

I walked up towards her and took her hands "he'll come back, Maya."

She threw her arms around me, taking me in surprise but it felt nice to have a gained a friend. Maya looked happier, less blue, and I'm glad to have helped her. 

"Thank you, Lottie." she said, pulling away "he'll come back, but not for me."

I smiled and put my hand in the pocket of my dress, pulling out the golden ring Hanna and Midori gave me for Jamie. Gently, I placed it in the palm of her hand and wrapped her fingers around it, leaving a flustered Maya. "Someone gave it to me for Jamie, but I think you should keep it for now," I said, grinning as Maya placed in her pocket, not letting go of the golden band. 

"Call me May,"

"Pardon?"

She chuckled "I only let my friends or family call me that, therefore you are now my friend."

Was this real? Did princess Maya Ashwick just call me her friend? I feel so honoured! I was about to give her my last traces of Jamie ----the remains of his wolf pendent and the note he wrote me---- when a slam of the door caught me off guard.

"I HATE THIS BUT-Lottie?" Ellie's voice boomed across the room; both May and I stood in silence, still in the state of shock. Maya was the first to speak.

"What the hell is your problem Ellie?!"

Ellie stuck her tongue out at her face before taking a sharp exhale and putting her hands on her hips "We're all going back to London,"