Wounds of My Heart

05. Sick

Adira's POV

No, please don't. Make it stop.

"Adira?"

Let me go, please.

"Adira?" I feel a hand shoving me gently and I wake up.

"Jordan?" I say confusedly looking around. My head still spinning from the nightmare I had and my whole body sweating.

"What is going on? Am I still dreaming?" I ask geniuely confused, I really can't comprehend if I'm still dreaming.

"It's ok, you were dreaming." He says noticing the fear and confusion in my eyes.

"Everything was a dream? Even that guy in the creepy street?" Please say yes.

"No. Not...that." He says and my heart feels heavy. Soon I start to remember everything, I was just confused on what we are doing in his car parked in front of my house.

"Why I'm here?"

"You fell asleep." He says nonchalantly and I look around once again. It's almost dark outside, but judging by the lack of cars in my porch, my parents aren't home yet.

"I'm sorry, you could have wake me up." I say embarrassed. He really waited here because my stupid ass fall asleep. But I'm so glad he didn't tried to carry me, that's so embarrassing. Not that he would even want to carry me in the first place.

"It's ok." He says in his usual dry asf tone.

"Oh god. Your knuckles." They were still covered with dry blood, and they seem bruised because of his hard punches.

"It's nothing." I can't help it but feel guilty, he had to fight for me. I was so weak to do anything, and now he is hurt.

"This happened because of me. Let me help." I say and he roll his eyes.

"Adira," he starts, his face made it obvious he was getting annoyed, but when his eyes met mine I could see his features softening. He seemed hesitant, as if he wasn't sure what to say.

"I'm ok, it's really nothing, just go home and rest." He says, his voice sounded different somehow.

I really wanted to take care of him, just as he took care of me, but if he doesn't want me to I'll just let go.

I open the door and get out of the car. "Thank you, Jordan. For everything." I say quietly before closing the door.

As soon as I get inside my house Jordan's car leave and I feel my eyes watering again, I was terrified.
.

It's 5:05 a.m. right now. I'm exhausted but I can't sleep, my whole body feels weak after all the trembling from before, and my mind wouldn't stop racing and reminding me every single detail to keep me awake.

Before I tried to lay down to fall asleep, I cried for like an hour downstairs. I've cried till I'm out of tears. I need to talk about this to someone, but the real question here is who.

I wish I could tell Jess, she is my only friend, but still I don't feel comfortable telling her.

I'll have to just save it to myself I guess.

.

A loud noise, that I hate so much, wakes me up. I feel like I'm dead, I probably slept like 30 minutes maximum. All the physical and emotional pain coming back to me as I come back to all my senses.

I really don't feel like doing anything today, I wish I could stay home but my parents won't let me, and they would want me to explain myself, which is the last thing I want. I just grabbed some sweatpants and a big hoodie from my closet. I don't even have the energy to take a shower, but I'm glad I showered yesterday's night hoping it would help me relax.