The Fifth Member (Little Mix/Perrie Edwards GxG)

Chapter 49

Beth's POV:

After Dr. Brown left we all stayed quiet. I was shocked. I always told them I'm fine because I genuinely believed I was. I never even considered that there actually is anything wrong.

But no apparently I'm not fine. What the fuck am I meant to do now?

I didn't dare look at any of them. I can only imagine their expressions, and I frankly did not want to see those hurt ones.

I heard sobbing and sadly I recognize it, as it tragically wasn't the first time this beautiful girl cried. The only person I've ever loved in the way I love her, the one person I truly believe deserves all the best in the world.

The one person that's hurting because of me.

I wanted to reassure her, comfort her, but how could I do that without hurting her more? I'm the reason for her hurt. She just sees me and her hurt will increase.

Slowly all of them started sobbing and I didn't know what to do. I know this is dangerous, but it's removable. The case that someone dies in that operation is very rare. Am I really that unlucky to die from that?

Alright that just confirmed their worries. I'm the most unlucky person I know.

Then slowly while they cried the situation became real. There is a possibility that I can die. A big one. Or there is a possibility that I forget stuff I can't get back. My memories with my family, or the five girls that are my life. What if I never get those memories back?

How would I even continue? I've spent 6 years with these girls. Day after day.

God Sam, what if I were to forget her? My best friend. The one person I can never pay back enough for what she did for me. The one who never left my side, not when I was bullied, not when I stopped eating, not when my family died and I became the most negative and depressed person ever and not when my father passed. Who I can call and rely on to give me advice that's helpful.

Tears stung my eyes. I didn't think I ever would fear death. It's not that I have been having death wishes as I used to have, but I wasn't scared of death. I always hoped after death I'm gonna reunite with my family. I'm holding onto that, but then when I think about Sam and the girls, do I really not fear death? What if these fantasies are all just fairy tale? What if I will never get to see my family nor them ever again?

I don't know what will happen to me after I'm dead.

I zoned back into reality and the girls were all still sobbing. I wiped the stray tear from my eye. I need to be strong for them.

"Girls." I said quietly. They all looked at me.

Jesy's upper lip was shaking as she looked at me. Her eyes red already from the crying. She tried to stop crying but it proved to be quite the challenge to her.

Leigh-Anne was choked up I could tell. Her eyes were still leaving tears every time she blinked. She had a hard time stopping her sobbing

Jade was shaking completely, I have never seen Jade cry, like really really cry to the point where she's shaking. She is similar to me in that way. She likes to deal with her troubles alone, but just like they do with me, we don't let her do that either. She was still crying her eyes out and barely was able to look at me.

And last but not least Perrie. My sweet Perrie. She didn't look at me. She was shaking more than Jade. Her sobbing didn't die down at all and I doubt she even heard me. The painful sound of her sobbing made my heart break. At first it was hard to pick out her sobbing because all of them were, but now that the other three tried to calm down, the pain, the fear, it's all clear in her sobbing.