Outside the Fortress
Tucker is searching for Church.
Tucker: Church! Chuu-urch, hey Church!
Church: I'm right behind you dumbass.
Tucker: Oh. Hey Church, do you have a knife?
Church: No. That's a weapon, dude, ask Tex.
Tucker: She said she had something to take care of. Girl stuff I think.
Church: Huh? Like what?
Tucker: I don't know, I stopped asking questions at 'girl stuff'.
Church: Then what about Matt?
Tucker: He said he's gonna look around the place.
Church: But that was an hour ago!
Tucker: I know, but he still hasn't came back.
Church: ...You think someone got him?
Tucker: Dude, do you know who you're talking about? That guy is the living definition of paranoia. The only thing that's gonna catch him off-guard is one of us proposing to him.
Church: Yeah, you got a point. Anyways, what're you two guys doin' over here?
Tucker: We're gonna teach the Alien how to speak English.
Church: How're you gonna do that?
Tucker: People learn English all the time, it aren't that hard.
Church: Maybe you should try learning his language. Like Matt did.
Tucker: Fuck that, we got here first, and that makes this a colony. Those're the rules, dude. Earth colony, Earth language.
Church: Tucker there's thousands of languages spoken on Earth.
Tucker: Hyeah, but only one that kicks ass. And that's the one we're teaching. English 101, remedial kick-ass.
Church: Alright, there is no way this is gonna work.
Tucker: Yeah it is, we got visual aids and everything.
Church: Where the hell'd you get those?
Tucker: We made 'em. Turns out Matt loaded Caboose's gun with crayons instead of bullets. I just need to cut one of these things, you have a pocket knife?
Church: Hey if you need to cut something, why don't you just use that big sword o' yours?
Tucker: Oh right. Duh.
Tucker draws his sword.
Lovam: What was that noise? (sees Tucker holding the sword) YOU DAARE TOUCH THE HOLY SWORD WITH YOUR FILTHY HUMAN HANDS!?
Lovam jumps at Tucker, tackles him to the ground and starts beating the shit out of him.
Tucker: Ahh, what the fuck!?
Church: Whoa! Mahan, Tucker, that thing either really hates that sword, or really hates you.
Lovam: CLAIMING THAT SWORD WAS MY DESTINY! MY MISSION! MY PURPOSE! MINE!
Tucker: Aaaaaaaah, get this fucking thing off me!
Church: Heh wait a second Tucker, this might be a good chance for us to evaluate how these things fight.
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Red vs Blue Season 4 /w Spartan Matthias
FanfictionSeason 4. The Reds have ruterned to Blood Gulch, while the Blues are under attack by a mysterious figure. Will they be able to defeat this unknown foe? The OCs Matthias and Beatrice are owned by Me. The OC Logan is owned by @flamebaron20. The OCs Da...
