Red vs Blue Season 4 /w Spartan Matthias

RvB S4 Ep18 "Things Are Looking Down"

Blood Gulch

Sarge is leading Simmons and Grif across the Gulch at what could almost be called a run.

Sarge: Come on, double time men! That goes double for you, Grif.

Grif: Why are we always double timing, anyway? Can't we ever half-time? Or how 'bout no time?

Sarge: No, numbnuts. According to Simmons, the Blues have already re-established contact with their Command. They already requested reinforcements! Twice!

Grif: What? That's why we're running?

Sarge: Of course. It means they're getting desperate. We've gotta act now before we're overwhelmed!

Grif: But why would their Command accept their request for reinforcements? For all we know, Simmons was set up, and we just wasted these few hours on nothing.

Sarge: If that was the case, then why would they receive supply drops every two weeks when we only get them once every month?

Grif: Really? I never saw that.

Simmons: That's because you always pick the day those extra supplies arrive to shut yourself in for the entire day.

Sarge: And then because of our lack in man-power, we were never able to raid them for those supplies, so they were alwasy better stocked then us!

Grif: Wait, that's why they always have better food?

Simmons: How would you know that?

Grif: I snuck in there once to see if they had some Nachos.

Simmons: How did that go?

Grif: I found their food storage, but I got caught by their leader before I could find their snacks. That's why they have those electric locks.

Sarge: So you mean to tell me that not only did you manage to infiltrate the enemy's base, but instead of trying to steal vital intelligence, you chose to raid their food storage, and got caught? And then you refused to report it to me?

Grif: I knew that this is how you would react. I just wanted to save us all the headache. And the oxygen.

Sarge: Grif, my dissapointment in you is immesurable. But I will try to measure it anyways.

Simmons: With all due respect sir, didn't we come out here to gather intel on the Blues?

Sarge: Gosh darn Simmons, you're cerrect! The shock I've received from Grif's complete incompetence made me forget of our short-term goals!

Grif: Always an inspiration, Sarge.

Sarge: (looks around) Hang on a minute. Where is Donut?

Simmons: There he is. Looks like he's talking to something.

Sarge: Looks like a rock. Grif!

Grif: What.

Sarge: I need information on that rock, ASAP! Approach the target via flanking maneouver and establish defilade at that ledge, Point Alpha!

Grif: Or I could just look through the scope of the sniper rifle since that's worked the last eight hundred times.

Sarge: Yeah alright fine, take all the fun out of it.

Grif looks through the scope and sees Donut talking to Lopez.

Sarge: I like my way better. It was more dangerous for you.