You belong with me/ Noah Schnapp x reader

Chapter 20: Dear John

(Fuck J*hn Mayer <3)

Y/n's pov

Noah and I haven't spoken in two weeks. Since I went to his house to apologize I've avoided him at all costs. Look, don't get me wrong, it's not that I hate him. I just feel so guilty. And I have no clue why. Sabrina is a shitty person, and all the things Noah said about her kinda backs my point up. But that doesn't mean she deserves to be cheated on. No body does. And knowing that I basically helped Noah cheat on Sabrina is killing me. I feel terrible about it which is why I can't face Noah.

Sometimes he would wave at me from his room, I'd wave back. or if he texted me, asking if I was good I'd reply. But as the days went on i kinda just ignored him...

Not on purpose- my mind just did it. I had no clue what I was doing but somehow my mind did. I know that doesn't even make sense. My mind is really frazzled at the moment with all this deciding between what I should do with me and Noah.

Noah's a sweet guy, but what he did i- I just can't accept his apology. Even though I said I did I just really didn't want to make things awkward between us. Well that completely backfired since I'm standing here, frozen, staring at Noah who has just asked me if I needed help opening my locker.

He steps in front of me checking out my lock. "Uhh what's the code?" He asks me. "3 4 8 7" I tell him.

He fiddled with the lock a bit until he pops it right off. "There you go" He says smiling. "Thanks" I say bluntly before stepping closer to my locker to shove my books into it.

"Y/n?" Noah asks me, leaning against the locker beside me. "Yeah?" I say rolling my eyes. Why can't he leave me alone?

"Are we good?" He says.

I stop slightly. "Of course we are" I slowly say, not looking at him.

"Well its doesn't feel like that" he mumbles. "What do you mean?" I say slightly irritated.

"You've been ignoring me these past two weeks and all day today, what's your problem?" He says. "There's no problem" I say through gritted teeth as I push a load of books into my locker.

"Really?" Noah scoffs. "Cause it seems like there is".

"Look Noah I'm tired, can I just finish putting these books here and go?" I sigh, lugging my bag over closer to me.

"You're avoiding me again" Noah says. I can tell his patience is running out.

"No I'm not" I reply.

"Yes. You are"

"Okay fine what if I am!" I say slamming my locker shut.

"Why? You said we're good" Noah explains.

"No, you just thought that I said that when I didn't" I tell him.

"You know you're really getting on my nerves right now y/n" he says annoyed.

"I can say the same about you" I snap back.
I can tell he's surprised by my comeback as his eyes get wide.

"What is your problem with me?" He asks me.

"Nothing it's just-" I start but he cuts me off. "Do you not like me or something? Do you hate me? What did I do y/n I don't understand. what the fuck is your problem with me?" He asks me, getting closer to me.

"You really have no idea?" I scoff.

"Why would I be asking you if I fucking knew?"  He spits out.

"It's stupid" I say.

"Well if it's so stupid why are you holding a grudge over it?" He questions.

"It doesn't really matter Noah can I please just go?" I say tiredly.

"Not until you tell me what I did" he says.

"You are so fucking oblivious" I mumble before reaching down and grabbing my bag from the ground. Noah grabs my wrist and pulls it back up.

"Hey! Let go dude!" I say trying to pull away from him, but his grip is strong. "Tell me" Noah says staring at me. I try to avoid his gaze but he puts his other hand under my chin and lifts my face up to look at him. I try pulling my wrist away again but his grip gets tighter.

"I don't trust you okay?!" I say while chancing one last pull away from Noah's grip before I'm let free and I grab my bag and turn around, walking as fast as I can.

But Noah's faster, he comes up in front of me and pushes me against the locker, one of his hands holding me against the locker, the other on the locker beside us so I can't escape.

"Let me go you freak!" I shout. "What is wrong with you?"

"What do you mean by you don't trust me?" Noah says quietly. I try to squirm from his grip but it's no use. I can feel the tears brimming in my eyes. Why is he doing this?

"Noah, please.... I wanna go" I say desperately. But of course he doesn't listen as he just stares at me, fury in his eyes while he waits for an answer. The hot tears fall onto my cheeks but Noah doesn't even move.

"You... you said you broke up with her when you didn't. You lied to me" I whisper, looking down.

"Y/n...." he starts.

"I thought maybe you trusted me enough to tell me that you were still dating Sabrina, it wouldn't have changed our friendship and we could've worked it out but instead you lied. And then you expect me to trust you- noah....." I tell him sniffling.

"I thought you would've understood!" He says.

"What makes you think I would've understood? I've never been in a situation like this. Boys barely talk to me and I thought you were aware that you're like the only guy I talk to that isn't gay or didn't want to get into my pants. And you were the only guy who I trusted. Emphasis on the -ed" I gasp out. "I've only dated like one other guy in like the eight grade I have no experience over any of this shit, especially not helping boys cheat on their girlfriends" i tell him.

"God you are very annoying" he says.

"And youre acting like a fucking child right now, by pinning me against the lockers and holding me against my will. I told you what the problem is so why can't you let me go?" I snap back, the tears falling down again.

"I just wanted to know why you were ignoring me and then fix whatever happened" he sighs.

"Well you broke it even more, you can't fix this" I say.

"I said I was sorry about a billion times what else more do you want from me?!" He says, throwing his hands up in the air. I take this as an opportunity to escape as I try to duck away from him. But he pins me back against the lockers again. Fucking yay.

"This isn't making it better for a start" I say pointing at his handing which is pressed into my collarbone. I wipe my tears from my eyes but they keep flooding out. His hand is now digging into my collarbone which really hurts. I whince a bit, hoping he'd get the message.

Noah loosens his grip on me a bit. "Shit, sorry y/n" he says apologetically.

"Just leave me alone...." I whisper.

Noah looks into my eyes. His hand from the locker moves over to my face where he wipes the tears on my cheeks gently. My heart skips a beat as he does that. At least I know he still cares about me. Even if it's a tiny bit.

"Can I go?" I whisper looking at his hand, which is cupping my cheek. "Y/n I'm sorry- I really fuck-" he starts but i cut him off "stop with all the apologies Noah, it's over." I tell him looking into his eyes. There's tears brimming in them. Those hazel eyes that i was mesmerized by for the past two months now just look dull and broken. Noah breaks the gaze and looks down.

He sighs and removes his hand from my chest. I breath a sigh of relief. I slowly bend down and pick up my bag. "I'm sorry Noah....." I say before walking away from him. My tears continuously streaming down my cheeks as I let out a small sob.

I leave Noah standing there as I quickly walk out of the hallway. Once I'm away from him I quickly run outside. All of the students are finally gone since it's been a while. We don't live too far from the school so I start walking home. I cried the whole way home.