When I'm with you

Just say the main words

His heart was pounding like crazy, his hands were cold, and lips were dry. Crowe had never felt so exhausted and pathetic before. He shook himself, trying to shake off the weight of the last few days. The decision was made, and Francis had to act. He took a deep breath and, gathering his strength, knocked on the door. A moment later it opened, and Sidney appeared in the doorway. In his hands were tubes of paint and brushes. 
"You're on time. Come in, " he said, hurriedly letting the guest in. 
"Where's Georgie?"  Crowe asked worriedly, looking at the suitcase beside the bed. 
"She's in the bathroom. She went to clean herself up", Sidney answered almost in a whisper, " What's up with Clara?" 
" We talked. It was an accident," Crowe said, " and she didn't mean to hurt Eliza. She just wanted to talk about it, like I thought. I left her with the lawyer Broome recommended. I hope everything works out as well as possible."
"It would be nice", muttered Sidney and pointing to the bathroom asked, "Tell me what's going on between you? She almost blew up the room, and, as you can see, she was going to run away from Sanditon."
"A little later," Francis said wearily, " and now can you leave Georgiana and me alone?  We need to talk, or this madness will never end."
"Whatever you say," Sidney said, handing him the paint cans, " But listen, If this is just a game for you, then better leave. I won't let you …" 
"Did you and Broome conspire? Who do you think I am?", asked Crowe irritably, "An evil monster that lures girls into the dark forest? Organ salesman? A slaver? Is there a trail of the humiliated and the insulted behind me? Do you think I'll drink all her blood and go back to sleep for a hundred years?" 
 "Dan and I are just worried about her ...Georgie ... she's ... special.", Sidney said. 
Crowe sighed heavily and looked at his old friend. 
"I know... "but please, just leave now....", he said. 
"All right," Mr. Parker said, and pointedly left the room. 
Crowe put the painting supplies in travel case and began to pick up the rest of the things on the floor. A comb thrown behind the nightstand, a broken brush, large sheets of paper lying in the corner. Georgiana was clearly upset. And it was mostly Crowe's own fault. He, as a man, should have taken the first decisive step long ago, and not torment her with doubts and guesses. Fran had feelings for Georgiana for quite some time, ever since she'd moved in with the Babbingtons after Sidney left for Australia. Back then, still married, Crowe was a frequent visitor to his friend's house.  Going back, he thought a lot about whether it was love at first sight, but came to the conclusion that it was not. Georgie had always attracted his attention, but to Fran she was just a headstrong, capricious girl. For a long time he could not understand his feelings, he considered them just fun and a fun game. Until he broke up with Clara. The divorce and the realization that Eric wasn't his son crushed Francis Crowe. He did not want to see or hear anyone for a long time, having gone into the world of his own fantasies and deeply immersed in his work, which, as it is not difficult to imagine, was very ambiguous and sometimes even mournful. His friends tried to cheer him up by inventing various entertainments, but it was of little use. Crowe was rather gloomy, continued to drink a lot, and his jokes became more and more offensive and sharp. One evening, when the Babbingtons were busy with the baby, and Francis was sitting on the sofa, aimlessly watching the embers burn down in the fireplace, Georgie suddenly came up to him, put her hand on his shoulder and said: "I understand, I'm not the kind of person you want to listen to.. but trust me... I know how you feel right now... betrayal is painful...you feel like your whole world has been turned upside down, and you want to die yourself... but look, you have to let it go, or you'll go crazy... don't blame yourself, it's not your fault...

shit just happens...but we need to move on with our lives." She was gone before Crowe could say anything, leaving him alone with his own thoughts and feelings. It was as if this little spoiled girl had slapped him in the face, making him remember who he really was. On that day, a new Francis was born, as if he had woken up, floated to the surface and breathed in the fresh sea air. A new life began, in which Georgiana played a significant role. It had all started with teasing, harmless jokes, some kind of childish flirtation, which had planted a tiny flame of warmth in his soul, which gradually grew into a huge flame that invisibly captured his entire being.  
Crowe smiled at the memory, picked up the sheets of paper from the floor, and began to lay them on the table. They were sketches. Naked, beautiful female and male bodies, as if in a dance, replaced each other. This fascinated Crowe. Suddenly, he froze as he saw his own face among them. The image was so similar, it was as if he was looking at himself in a mirror. Every line, every hair, and every wrinkle was exactly in its place. He looked around for a photo, but it was nowhere to be found. "Did she draw me from memory?" he thought, and this made his heart warm, and a satisfied smile appeared on his face. 
"Sidney, don't tell Charlotte about what happened", she said, entering the room, simultaneously wiping her face with a towel, "she already got it, not enough for her to worry about me...." 
He whirled around, still holding his own image. 
"What are you doing here?" she asked, trying to look as if she was extremely displeased with his appearance, even though her heart was pounding in a frenzied rhythm and a thousand butterflies were fluttering in her stomach. 
"You know, you're still pretty good at drawing," he said, completely ignoring her question, " much better than I thought before." 
"Why are you here?"  Georgie snapped at him again, moving closer and trying to snatch the sketch of the portrait out of his hands, "Everything I do doesn't concern you... and ... I'm not interested in your opinion at all. Go to the one who cried on your chest. Clara is suffering so much. She needs you to feel sorry for her and maybe warm her up again under your warm wing. Isn't that what you want?"
Georgiana had promised herself not to get worked up, but the picture she had witnessed two hours earlier was still in her head. Jealousy tore her apart. She had hated Clara for a long time. Miss Brereton had acted meanly, betrayed and regularly humiliated Crowe in front of the public, for the sole purpose of making money. And now Fran was once again helping this upstart, once again extending a helping hand and offering his shoulder, risking another stab in the back. "Why? Did he still love that reptile? Maybe everything that happened between us wasn't what it seemed?"  Georgie asked herself. But there was no answer, and all she had to do was stare at the familiar face to see what the person she loved was really thinking. 
"I didn't come here to discuss Clara," he said dryly, " I'm so tired...". 
"Poor, poor Crowe. All the misfortunes are on you, and here I am also asking my stupid question", Georgiana tried to tease him, out of excitement and fear she began to attack the one whom she fervently wanted to hold to her chest, "maybe you should still go back to Clara? I think she can consolate you."
"I don't need any consolation," he said calmly, " much less from her". 
His overly calm demeanor, and, as it seemed to her, his indifference, completely unsettled Miss Lamb. 
"You never need anything!! You don't need anyone! You're a crazy loner, Crowe!", Georgiana exclaimed resentfully, trying in vain to pull the paper out of his hands, but Fran held it in a death grip. He wanted her to be as close as possible.

"No," he said calmly, pulling her closer to him, "and you know better than anyone. I think you're the only one who can understand me completely…" 
"Understand? How can you even be understood?", she exclaime, "I've always knew that you couldn't stand me, always making faces, joking, teasing, reproaching, and complaining, but you can't hold out for a second without sticking a hairpin in me. I've come to terms with it, but then I suddenly come across in your book ... well, forget it...."
"No, tell me, I'm listening to you carefully," Crowe said, barely suppressing a smile. 
Georgiana screamed, threatening to turn into a whirlwind that would destroy everything in its path. The situation was critical, but no less comical. It suddenly occurred to him that their relationship couldn't have been any different. Georgiana was a hurricane that not everyone could tame. But Crowe had to try 
"Your heroes, they're ...they're just like us...JJ, you called her JJ ... it can't be a coincidence, "Georgiana continued," Then you kiss me, take me by surprise, take care, try to be useful, lie to the Babbingtons and the police for me...God, you even say you love me, while calling me a fool ...and then... then you're being rude and avoiding me again ... hugging your ex in front of me... what kind of understanding are you talking about when I don't even know who you really are? Who are you, Fran? Everything I knew about you turned out to be untrue. I thought all you did was drink and have affairs with stupid chickens, but really … 
He laughed and surreptitiously moved a little closer to her. Georgiana was so engrossed that she didn't notice his maneuver. They stood side by side,still holding the ill-fated piece of paper with the portrait on it. 
"I don't see anything funny," she snorted, surprised at his reaction. 
"Why not?" I'm a really sad alcoholic who doesn't miss a single skirt, "he said, still laughing," and I also constantly offend women and children, and I don't like cats either". 
"Stop clowning around! Why do you always try to make fun of every word I say? What do you even want?", she asked. 
"You," he said without hesitation, " the only thing I miss in this life. I can handle the rest myself somehow."
"Why? Why are you playing with me again?", she muttered, waving her hands, clearly intending to pull away.
"Because I am who I am! I don't know how to be nice, I don't know how to talk directly about my feelings, " he said, grabbing her hands and dropping the sketch on the floor.,  "God, Georgie, I didn't think I could feel anything until a little while ago. At least not like this. Never before had any woman so irritated and attracted at the same time. This is crazy! "
"So I'm annoying you?"  Miss Lamb snapped at him, clearly intending to free herself and slap him in the face, " Smug turkey! Do you think everyone around you should always dance to your tune? You think you're the navel of the earth? Let me go!" 
Crowe wanted desperately to pull her into his arms, to kiss her, to drown her in his hot embrace and make her forget all her worries and doubts, but instead he just opened his fingers and let her go.
"Is that all? Is that all you can do? Will you just let me go and leave? As usual? Of course, it's also the easiest way! No feelings , no pain, right, Francis? she asked. 
Georgiana had unconsciously provoked Crowe to take more active action and was extremely disappointed by his behavior.
There was a real storm brewing in his soul, ready to burst out, but Crowe stubbornly held it back, knowing full well that this was not the time or the placefor it. 
"I'm not Otis, Georgie," Francis said, struggling to keep his composure, " I don't need it... "
"Then what do you want?"  Georgiana shouted.
"For you to love me as much as I love you, of your own free will," Francis said, looking her straight in the eye, " for you to listen to my stupid jokes and still want to be there for me... but.".. if you don't need it at all, I will...."

Georgiana ran to Francis before he could finish what he was about to say. The butterflies that had fluttered in her stomach so recently seemed to have left her, tearing her soul into a thousand tiny, glittering crystals. His strong arms, as if obeying some call, gently wrapped around her slender figure and greedily pressed her to his hot, eager body. 
A small shiver ran down Georgiana's spine in anticipation of something unusual and exciting. Her hands fluttered up to his shoulders, and her fingers tangled happily in Crowe's thick curls. 
"I really, really need to" she whispered...
Francis pulled her closer and leaned down to kiss her gently on the lips. Georgiana returned his kiss with fervor. The tangle of hands, the tangle of lips and bodies, the tangle of hearts, drove Georgie and Fran mad, making them forget everything else.
The summer sun slowly, as if lazily, sank below the horizon, illuminating the hotel room with its last rays. The first twilight slipped in quietly, wrapping Fran and Georgie gently in its tenderness and hiding them from prying eyes. A long and incredibly difficult day for both of them was going away, giving the most important thing, understanding and hope for happiness.