When I'm with you

Are you crazy?

"Damn," she muttered, turning Sidney over on the couch and trying to bring him to his senses as quickly as possible.
Their friends left them alone, right after Crowe told them about the events of the previous night. According to Phil, Mr. Parker showed up at the pub on Wickham Street is in a terrible mood around midnight. Sidney was sober and wanted only one thing - to participate in the so-called "spectacle", namely underground fights organized by the owner of the institution. Phil couldn't deny him that. To the surprise of the owner, who had not seen Parker for many years, he was in great shape and easily took down the first three opponents. Sidney didn't seem happy at all, but rather annoyed at the way things were going. Each time, he became angrier and angrier, generously feeding his inner fire with alcohol, which Phil had in myriad quantities. In the end, he met a worthy opponent, the local bully Joseph, who, despite his impressive size, was quite a clever and experienced fighter. Sidney hit hard and mercilessly, but then received the same blows in return. Their fight was as exciting for the audience as it was exhausting for both fighters. Phil, who readily accepts bets on the outcome of the match, was extremely pleased with what was happening. The fight lasted quite a long time. It seemed that the forces on the side of Joseph and the loser Parker will have no choice but to lie shamefully on the floor of the tavern. But that was not the case. With an unknown amount of strength, Sidney attacked the bully again and knocked him to the floor with a series of powerful blows. Joseph couldn't get up again. It was a clean knockout victory.
Much to Phil's surprise, this Victoria didn't calm Parker down at all, but rather infuriated him. He started drinking again and continued until he passed out on the old sofa in the corner of the room, where Georgie and Crowe found him in the morning.
"What's going on with you, Sidney? Oh, my God, it's all my fault," Charlotte almost whispered
The tears began to flow slowly down her cheeks, but Miss Heywood didn't notice them. She wanted everything that had happened last night to be just a bad dream. She wanted to close her eyes and Wake up in the morning in Sidney's arms. Nothing: no events at 15 Colinslane, no police station, no horse poisoning, no deranged Sidney in her life.
"It can't be true, it's just a nightmare," Charlotte told herself. "No. Not with me! Now I Wake up and everything will be as before" She had let down her hair and lay down beside Sidney on the couch. He instinctively scooped her up in his strong arms. Charlotte closed her eyes and tried to sleep.

A bright ray of sunlight fell on her face, causing Charlotte to Wake up. She stretched lazily, feeling Sidney's warm body next to hers. He was sleeping with his nose on the back of her head. His arms were wrapped tightly around her body.
Charlotte was in no hurry to open her eyes, glad that all the horror that had happened to her and Sidney was just a product of her sick imagination. Hell, it was so real that she believed everything she saw.
"You need to go to bed on time," Charlotte said sternly to herself, "otherwise it's not far to the psych ward. I'll dream about it. "
She snuggled closer to Sidney, savoring the last moments before she got up and started making Breakfast. They would have to meet with James today to sort out some details about the Assembly. Then a conversation with Allison. It can't be put off any longer. Her sister clearly needed to talk about Broome, but she would never start first. Oh, that's her shyness about some things.
Charlotte giggled and lifted Sidney's hand and kissed the back of it gently, as she often did in the morning. It felt rough to her. Miss Heywood opened her eyes and looked at Sidney's hands, and wept bitterly. His knuckles were swollen and covered in small bruises and abrasions. It meant only one thing. The nightmare that had happened at 15 Colinslane wasn't a dream at all, it was as real as an unwashed Cup of coffee left behind Crowe on the coffee table, and the broken rose still sticking out of the trash can.
Doubt and despair had completely taken over her, robbing her of her ability to think straight. Charlotte felt a surge of anger and power that she hadn't even known existed. She disentangled herself from Sidney's arms and sprang to her feet, grabbing him by the front of his shirt, easily bringing his body to a partially vertical position.
"Sidney, look at me!" "Wake up, Sidney!" she almost shouted, "Now!".
He grimaced at the loud words and tried to lie back down, but immediately received a heavy slap from his fiancee. Charlotte was furious. She loved Sidney dearly, but now she hated him for being so weak, for going to these stupid fights, and then getting drunk instead of just talking to her. She hated him for possibly killing in a fit of rage Eliza Campion, destroying three lives at once: Mrs. Campion's, hers, and his own.
"Don't you dare fall asleep, Sidney! she shouted, slapping him hard on the other cheek.
Startled, he opened his eyes and jumped up from the sofa, almost knocking Charlotte off her feet. It seemed to him that he was still in the tavern, and the fight was still going on. Seeing Charlotte in front of him, Sidney paused, looked around, and realizing where he was and what had happened, let out a heavy sigh, lowered his hands, and looked at her with eyes full of pain.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to," he whispered faintly, " it just happened... She pissed me off."
It seemed to Charlotte that the world around her had shattered into billions of tiny fragments that had hit her right in the heart. She wanted to cry and scream at the top of her voice. She wanted to die, not to feel this pain tearing her soul apart. Charlotte couldn't believe that her lover could take the life of another person, even if it wasn't a very good one, even if it was an accident. It was unbearable.
Sidney held out his hands to her, but Charlotte jerked away from him and immediately took a few steps back.
"Look, calm down, we can settle it..."  he said, struggling for words.
Sidney's head was pounding, he was sick, and he could barely stand.
"Settle it? How can this be settled?" said Charlotte indignantly, "Are you out of your mind?"
"We can try to just forget about it," Sidney muttered, licking his dry lips with difficult, "Let's forget about her..."
"Just forget it? You're not yourself. You need to sober up right now.", Charlotte exclaimed.
Grabbing the collar of his shirt with both hands, Charlotte pulled Sidney confidently into the tub. He didn't think straight and didn't resist following her. Only now Sidney realized how furious she was. He had never seen his fiancee so belligerent. She could handle anyone, even a grown man. Miss Heywood, meanwhile, dragged Sidney into the shower stall, pushing him into the far corner so hard that he almost fell, and turned on the cold water at full power. The icy spray refreshed Sidney's head, gradually bringing him to his senses. He felt an incredible chill and, unconsciously, cried out as streams of water poured down his back and down, trickling into his trousers and boots, which he still hadn't taken off. Sidney dropped his eyes and looked at Charlotte. She was standing next to him, still holding tight to the collar of his shirt, as wet as he was. Her long, thick hair fell in wide strands around her shoulders, and her eyes were filled with pain, anger, rage, and something that scared Sidney.
"What is it? Disappointment? Indifference?", he thought.
"What the hell are you doing?", he said angrily.
"I'm clearing your brain", bitterly said Charlotte, "that's just a pity that it's too late!"
"Too late for what?", Sidney asked, surprised.
"For everything! For us!", with difficulty, swallowing a lump in his throat, replied Charlotte.
"What? What nonsense is this? What are you talking about?", he asked.
"You were at Eliza Campion's, weren't you?", Charlotte asked, struggling to control herself.
"Yes, last night," he said without hesitation, "I couldn't leave it like this... Eliza snuck into our house, left a nasty message. Hell, she's living around the corner, just to annoy us. Eliza made you leave home. I couldn't let it go.
"You talk about it so easily...",  Charlotte said, tears streaming down her cheeks, " as if it were normal..."
"It's normal to hate a person who is systematically trying to destroy your whole life, over and over again, day after day, without pity or regret", he replied, "and what did you want from me? Biblical forgiveness? Eliza doesn't deserve this! Deep down, I've always wanted to strangle this bitch and make sure she's never found."
"Don't say that! You can't say that!" sobbed CHARLOTTE, "I don't believe you did it on purpose. Please tell me it was an accident, please..."
"I thought a lot before I went to ELIZA", he REPLIED, "before I wanted to avoid this, to solve everything peacefully, but yesterday I realized that it's time to put an end to everything. She would never give up. Mrs. Campion should no longer be in our LIVES".
Charlotte swung her arm to slap him again, but Sidney, sobered by the icy water, caught her hand.
"Will you do to me what you did to her?"  Charlotte snapped at him, her face contorted in a grimace of pain and DESPAIR, "Hit  me and leave me to die?
He turned off the water and, grabbing Charlotte tightly, dragged her out of the shower stall. Sidney looked at her blankly, but all he saw in her eyes was pain and despair.
"What? Why are you saying this?", surprised asked he, "I won't never lay a finger on you, you know."
"After what you me now told, I realized, that at all nichert not know about you",answered Charlotte, barely cope with own tears, "I have no idea who such Sidney Parker!"
She tried to pull away, but he held her even tighter.
"What did I say? What's going on with you?", Sidney asked again, "I just couldn't handle my emotions and acted like a complete jerk, deciding to blow off steam. I was very angry... and then i'm got drunk like an alcoholic. But can you really hate me for that? I'm not making any excuses for myself, but are you really willing to break up with me just because of this?"
"Blow off steam?", said Charlotte, "you don't have enough of what happened on KolinsLane?"
"Of course not", surprised Sidney, slightly loosening its grip" why I should be satisfy this visit at all?"
"Are you really sick?", Charlotte exclaimed angrily, finally escaping from his grasp," you came to Eliza and...."
- Yes, and she didn't even open the door for me! ", Sidney interrupted her, clutching his head," I saw her on the porch and called out to her, but she didn't turn around and went straight into the house and locked the door. I knocked, asked her to open it, then lost my temper, even tried to break down the door, but she wouldn't even talk to me. That bitch didn't say a word to me after all the shit she did. I was going to tell her what I thought of her, threaten her with a report of harassment if she didn't stop her stupid behavior..."
"So you never saw her?"  Charlotte asked faintly, her heart pounding so fast it seemed like it was going to burst out" And than you mad, so you went to the tavern and got drunk?"
"Yes, I told you so right away", Sidney replied, still not understanding what she was driving at, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry that I disappointed you so much. I guess instead of going to the pub, I should have come to Sanditon House and just taken you home. That would be the best solution."
A cry of relief escaped her lips, and Charlotte started, and without another second's hesitation, threw herself on Sidney's chest. He held her close again, lifting her a little off the ground. Charlotte wrapped her arms around Sidney's neck and nuzzled his ear. Both of them were still dripping cold water, making ugly puddles on the bathroom floor, but they didn't care. For a while, both Sidney and Charlotte simply froze, unable to tear themselves away from their beloved. For the first time that day, they once again felt the warmth that they usually gave each other so generously. It was priceless.
"So you didn't killed Eliza Campion, " she whispered happily.
"Of course not," Sidney began, then stopped and put Charlotte on her feet and looked into her eyes, What? ... Someone killed Eliza?...When? "

Sidney ruffled his hair nervously and began pacing the room again.
" This is all some nonsense", finally, he said, "why would someone kill Eliza? No, she was a rare bitch, but to kill... How desperate was it to be? What had she done to this poor man?"
"Are you serious?", Charlotte asked, "do you think she provoked the killer herself?"
The Cold shower and the nervous shock paid off. It had been more than an hour, but Charlotte couldn't get warm.
"Yes. This is more than likely. You should have seen the way she talks to her subordinated...", he said, "I'm sure that every third person who faced her wrath wanted to strangle her with their bare hands, and every second person wanted to run her over with a car... well, every first person secretly hoped that a meteorite from the sky would fall right on her. Eliza was never shy in her expressions and liked to humiliate in public. It gave her a lot of pleasure. Although, when she needed it, she could be quite nice and courteous."
"How she did with you?", Charlotte asked quietly.
"Believe me, in all this time, I've been able to see Eliza from all sorts of angles", he said with a sigh," and most of them were very unpleasant"
"Do you regret what happened?", she asked again, picking up a Cup of hot coffee.
"Yes, Damn it! I wish she'd disappeared from my life, but she didn't die... I'll admit that sometimes I wanted to kill her, but it was only a fleeting emotion...and now I'm sorry..." , Sidney said, "too bad her whole stupid life ended like this... all alone in a pool of blood"
"What's next, Sidney?"  Charlotte asked, putting down the large mug and wrapping the blanket around her ears again.
He smiled and came over and sat down next to her on the sofa, giving her a big hug. She rested her head on his shoulder.
"It's going to be all right," Sidney said, holding her even tighter.
"What if they think it's you, like me?"  Charlotte asked warily.
"I didn't do anything illegal," Sidney said, " which means I have nothing to fear."
"Who is the real killer?", she muttered to herself.
Sidney didn't answer, just shrugged. He would like to know who decided to take Mrs. Campion's life and why.
"Perhaps you need to get some sleep", finally said Sidney, "you spent the night in a police station is unlikely to go well for you, plus a cold shower. In short, little pleasant."
"Well, the second was already on my own initiative", grinned Charlotte, "I should have anticipated the consequences. But... I had a good goal."
He smiled and gently kissed her temple.
"You'll ever forgive me for being such an idiot... for letting all these stupid thoughts get into your pretty head?", Sidney asked, carefully running his fingers through the strands of her hair.
"Mmmm, let me think...." she said, pretending to think about something.
"Hey!, he exclaimed, "are you serious?"
"That was a difficult question," she began seriously, but then she laughed at his surprised and strained face.
For a minute or two, she just couldn't stop. The laughter was tearing Charlotte apart. Then she pulled herself together and looked back at Sidney.
" Sorry, sorry", answered Charlotte, smiling, "if you could see yourself..."
He silently pulled her closer and gently kissed Charlotte on her parted lips. The kiss was long, but more tender than passionate. Pulling back, he smiled and ran his hand through her hair again.
"I'm so glad you're okay," he said.
She smiled back at him.
"It's probably wrong...", she said, "that I'm sitting here laughing and Eliza is lying in the morgue, in the refrigerator..."
He lowered His eyes and looked at her again with a heavy sigh.
"Don't even think about it," Sidney said, " what happened was neither your fault nor mine. You did everything you could and you have to move on. Without looking back on the past and without regrets."
"I'm not sure I can," Charlotte said.
"You will one day," Sidney said, kissing her again, this time on the nose, " and I'll try to help you. Now, let me make something delicious. Are you hungry?"
"Yes, very much," Charlotte admitted.
"In that case, Madam, I suggest you take a NAP while your faithful servant prepares a delicious meal for you," he said, getting up and putting more pillows on Charlotte's bed.
"I agree to these terms," she said, smiling broadly.
Charlotte lay down on the sofa, and Sidney, carefully covering her with a second blanket and kissing her on the cheek, went into the kitchen.
He opened the refrigerator and began methodically pulling out the food he needed. He moved confidently and clearly, without thinking about his actions. There was only one question in his mind: "Who could have killed Eliza Campion?"