somewhere only we know | huang renjun

005 | you're happier.

!you're happier.

               "Y/N," a familiar voice called out from down the hall. "wait up!"

i turned around to see renjun weaving in and out of the crowd to make his way towards me, arms full with notebooks and a bulky pencil case.

"let me eat lunch with you," he requested kindly. i waited a moment before replying, looking him up and down as if to evaluate him as viable company to eat with.

"only because you saved me this morning," i scrunched my nose, teasing him, and motioned for him to follow me outside to meet my friends, donghyuck and chenle.

it didn't take long before he had us all laughing, unable to find a spare second to eat any lunch. as it turned out, we had a lot more in common than i had expected. he told me about how he likes to paint, and that if he could major in some kind of art degree it would be his dream come true.

"you have to promise to show me some of your work when we get home tonight, okay?"

"i will," he vowed.

while it had only felt like we were sat for a minute, the ringing of the bell soon rudely interrupted our conversations, signalling 5 minutes before the end of the hour we had for lunchtime. we stood up, collecting our belongings from the table in front of us and got ready to make our way back inside. donghyuck and chenle left to get to their next class, leaving renjun and me alone at the table. as i tossed the leftovers of my lunch into my backpack, renjun made one last remark, catching me off guard.

"you know, at first i thought you didn't like me or something, the way you spoke to me the times i met you outside your house."

i looked up at him, confused.

"but you're different at school. you're happier. why?"

it took everything inside me not to word-vomit all over him with a lengthy anecdote of having lived under a negligent and abusive father for years, which had made me hate just about everything at any given moment. unable to find a white lie to replace my unwanted rant, i zipped my bag up in silence only managing to respond with a shrug of my shoulders.

"most people are the opposite," renjun continued. "they hate school," he added with a laugh, "i know i do."

i looked at him with a slanted frown, not knowing how to respond.

"i don't know."

renjun seemed to understand my tone, not pushing with his curiosity any further. i started to walk towards the main building for our next class, him following close behind me. i approached the door but before i could walk in, renjun tapped the back of my shoulder, grabbing my attention. i turned around, lifting my eyebrows as if to ask him what he wanted.

"why don't we hang out this weekend? let's do something, i want to see you more," he proposed confidently.

flashbacks of my dad yelling at me to never even look at this boy again flooded my brain, and as fun as it was to hang out at school where i was safe, there was nothing i dreaded more than having to defend myself to such an angry face again. i had to be careful with offers like these. and from experience, i had learned that there really is no route to escape from my dad.

"i don't think i can," i dismissed apologetically, "nice idea though." i turned back to face the door and pushed my way in, renjun struggling to catch up behind me as i walked quickly down the hallway to try and escape his begging.

"what about next week?"

i shook my head in rejection. "not then, either," i explained. "i'm really busy," i lied. "just forget about it."

seemingly dumbfounded, renjun stopped still and watched as i continued walking away from him towards the classroom. it was painfully easy to tell how disappointed he was. i felt bad, but the quicker he could detach himself from me, the quicker he could find new friends that weren't on house arrest every other night.